Morning everyone !!
Six AM here in cold, flaky AZ. Yup, there was snow on the car this morning. Hilly just left for work and had to warm her truck up ... LOL .... not something she enjoys waiting for.
In any event, no post yesterday, and today's will be shorter than usual. My body has been in excruciating pain for the last few days. I not only suffer from the chronic disease of diabetes, I also have been diagnosed with fibromyalgia, degenerative joint disease, coupled with the neuropathic pain in my legs and feet (neuropathy). Now .... I can't help but laugh at the comments made to me over the years by psychiatric professionals, as well as some GPs asking .... "are you depressed?" Well .... after "therapy" by a couple of these professionals on the east coast, I was told, "there is nothing I can do for you, come back and see me if you get depressed." What the hell is that ???!!! Okay ... so let's try and put it into prospective. I believe, (this is only my opinion), that ANYONE who suffers from a chronic disease is bound to suffer from depression at one time or another, I know I have. Now .... add on not only the chronic disease, but lets add chronic PAIN ... not a pretty combination at times. The last couple of days I have hurt so badly that I could cry and most that know me will tell you they have only seen this on a couple of occasions, and it is usually a combination of my pain, and some sort of mental upheaval caused by family matters. (The latter seeming to occur more and more over the last couple of years). Nothing takes the pain away!!! I have been on so many medication trials, and combos that I actually had to be detoxed (5 days inpatient) from Vicodin several years ago, (prescribed by one doctor for 5 years, and my neurologist detoxed me due to the fact I tried to stop taking it and developed excruciating headaches that would not go away) and the shit never even worked!! I rarely took it as prescribed 4x/day, but only when I had a lot of physical work to get done, as it would only take the edge off my pain to work in the yard, or when I pushed myself to do things I probably shouldn't have been doing physically. I am a little more cautious these days, but I still have things that need to be done, and no man around to help me out. So I do it myself. Things that seem as simple as shoveling rock or even pulling weeds, or shoveling dog crap .... can put me down in pain. Now I don't like to bitch about my pain, but I do prefer to be left alone while I work though it when it gets to this level. Which has not been the case this weekend. It was to have been a long-holiday weekend for me, and it has turned into a trip each day into town to do something for my father due to the fact his car is in my driveway for a couple of reason., Like last night to deliver hockey tickets that Hillary and I were to attend a game. I hurt so bad that there was no way I could have sit in a cold hockey arena ... and I really was looking forward to going to the game with Hilly. At the moment, the pain in my hands is so bad that my left hand is numb and tingling (like it is asleep) and every joint in my body feels like it has a pulse of its own. This sort of "speed bump" can really be frustrating, especially seeing as I make a good portion of my living these days typing. I have had to tweek my everyday doings over the last 15 or so years to accommodate things I used to take for granted, like twisting off a cap. My hand strength sucks .... this has been made worse by a hand injury that occurred while I was married, which causes swelling in the joints of my hand.
Now ... all of this affects blood sugar control. Stress, we all know can affect us, the highs and lows of trying to keep an even keel on life, plus pain. Pain can do a real job on BGs. If it is chronic, we really need to come to terms with it and learn to listen and read our bodies to make the most of our control. I will admit ... there are times, I would just like to toss up my arms and say ...... "F it!!" (no offense meant to anyone) .... LOL .... actually had this topic pop up in a phone conversation this weekend ..... LOL ... my language on the blog. :D (at least I didn't spell it all the way....LOL). I had so much I wanted to get accomplished this weekend, and I don't think that any of it, with the exception of putting on a holiday dinner, was accomplished, and to be quite honest, I could have done without the food, I would have been content with a hot turkey sandwich, or better yet, cereal.....LOL.
Today ... I need to get some laundry done as I have to go back to work tomorrow, I have to go back into Prescott and pick up my father's prescriptions, which he again waited until he took the last one before telling me they were out, (yes, I suppose I should know when they are out, but I too, have a life full of things for me to remember), and I wanted to take Maggie to a pet seminar, to evaluate her for training, which I am not sure I can handle due to the pain. (I eventually want Maggie to be my therapy dog, or a good citizen animal).
Okay ..... well .... given how much I want and/or have to do today, I better get going as I have been typing for 30 minutes. I will try and let you know how well I did .... but yesterday, I think I spent a total of 4 hours on the couch with a heat bag on various parts of my body (wish I could say it was 4 hours all at once ....LOL). I am laughing but only on the inside ... as it hurts to put that much motion forward.
I wish everyone a wonderful Sunday !!!
relax and enjoy !!
et
Sunday, November 29, 2009
Friday, November 27, 2009
The day after ....
Hello all !!
I hope everyone enjoyed their day yesterday, whatever it may have held.
Our day went pretty well. We had a really nice dinner, my dad had spent the night with Hilly and I, and a cousin and friend joined us for dinner. It all went very well, except I was totally exhausted by the time everyone left at 6:00 having been up since my usual 5:30 and on my feet cooking and making sure things were clean and neatly arranged. I even bought myself some fall flowers .... I needed the lift.... and to be honest, I think I am worth the 6 bucks once in a while....LOL.
Brian took my dad home about 5:00 while I did some cleaning up of leftovers and dishes, and Nancy and Hilly were chatting about fundraising, the yard sale, the posting of fliers. I really wish I had the stamina sometimes to go and go and go, and keep on going....... but I don't and I have to listen to my body, which I don't always do. Last night I crashed out on the couch a little before 8 only to be awoken about 10ish with a blood sugar of 34!! Not being totally coherent, I didn't realize that Maggie had been sitting right at my head, I think she had been trying to get my attention, then I saw the "dump" at the back door!!! LMAO ..... apparently she too, had eaten too much. I was not really with it, so I did what I had to do to raise my blood sugar, and cleaned up her mess and let her out to try again. She was up again at two !! We then got up with Hillary at 5:30 as she got ready for work, and I laid back down. So.... here it is 9:30 and I feel like I have been hit by a bus, will take a shower, take Maggie to the park so she can do some running, and go to my dads to pack up some more "stuff" ..... which is turning into a never ending task, and an incredible emotional drain.......but unfortunately, it needs to be done and I want to try and get it all settled prior to any trips to San Francisco.
On Weds. afternoon I got a call from Debbie, the transplant nurse coordinator for the trial. All my paper work had been reviewed, it was all in, and we have a hold up!!! I was so totally disappointed when she said that, I had to catch my breath. In spite of the fact that I had a dobutamine stress test in July of 2007 (a chemically induced stress test which is far from pleasant). The trial requires that one be done within a year of trial participation. Which means I am going to have to undergo one again, preferably before the end of the year so as I don't eat a huge bill I can't afford. So I will be making a call to my local cardiologist in just a few minutes to see what can be done. The fact that I have a cardiac history, my 3 ablations to correct that nasty arrhythmia that was taking me down a few years back, with no issues since, the last one was negative. So ..... I can only hope and pray that another one can be covered in this time frame through my insurance, and that I in fact pass it without any complications. It really is an unpleasant experience. They pump you with this chemical to induce a heart rate of a certain level .... (the dobutamine) .... when your heart races at a pace that you may have just run for your life for 3=5 minutes and your heart feels like it is going to explode out of your chest, the feeling of "Yak" is what comes to the forefront of my mind. I am sure, that it will not be the most unpleasant thing I experience in my future, but it is not something I will look forward to.
So..... that is where it sits at the moment. I will most likely not be making my first trip before the first of the year, but .... it is still looking pretty good. I need to pass this test again, which I think I will, but with the stress levels and emotional upset that I have been carrying around with me for the last year, and having to deal with so many other's issues and whining, it all has a tendency to build up and leave a sense of havoc on ones mind and body. So .... maybe there is a trip over the mountain to Sedona one of these days soon for a day trip of walking the paths of healing ..... hell, I rub rocks and hum too if I thought it would make a difference .... LOL .... the scenery in Sedona is so breathtaking, that it sort of acts like the ocean always had for me, a sense of calming to regroup and realize that in the big scheme of things, I am just a small speckle, and to maintain a focus of what I find to be important for me, but a dose of ocean air and the smells of the water and sand, is something I could REALLY use. It was a place my mom and I always went to, often times together, ..... it was sort of weird in hind sight, the ocean, where you see to infinity, hearing the sounds, taking in the smells, listening .... it was truly a calming experience ..... hard for me to explain. Some people go to church, I prefer to go to the coastline and just listen, close my eyes and feel what could be.
Ok ... enough of that sort of chat ... LOL .... I was putting myself to sleep there :D
I have to get it in gear and be slightly productive .... and on that note, wish everyone a wonderful, relaxing weekend !!!!!!
Talk soon,
Peace
et
I hope everyone enjoyed their day yesterday, whatever it may have held.
Our day went pretty well. We had a really nice dinner, my dad had spent the night with Hilly and I, and a cousin and friend joined us for dinner. It all went very well, except I was totally exhausted by the time everyone left at 6:00 having been up since my usual 5:30 and on my feet cooking and making sure things were clean and neatly arranged. I even bought myself some fall flowers .... I needed the lift.... and to be honest, I think I am worth the 6 bucks once in a while....LOL.
Brian took my dad home about 5:00 while I did some cleaning up of leftovers and dishes, and Nancy and Hilly were chatting about fundraising, the yard sale, the posting of fliers. I really wish I had the stamina sometimes to go and go and go, and keep on going....... but I don't and I have to listen to my body, which I don't always do. Last night I crashed out on the couch a little before 8 only to be awoken about 10ish with a blood sugar of 34!! Not being totally coherent, I didn't realize that Maggie had been sitting right at my head, I think she had been trying to get my attention, then I saw the "dump" at the back door!!! LMAO ..... apparently she too, had eaten too much. I was not really with it, so I did what I had to do to raise my blood sugar, and cleaned up her mess and let her out to try again. She was up again at two !! We then got up with Hillary at 5:30 as she got ready for work, and I laid back down. So.... here it is 9:30 and I feel like I have been hit by a bus, will take a shower, take Maggie to the park so she can do some running, and go to my dads to pack up some more "stuff" ..... which is turning into a never ending task, and an incredible emotional drain.......but unfortunately, it needs to be done and I want to try and get it all settled prior to any trips to San Francisco.
On Weds. afternoon I got a call from Debbie, the transplant nurse coordinator for the trial. All my paper work had been reviewed, it was all in, and we have a hold up!!! I was so totally disappointed when she said that, I had to catch my breath. In spite of the fact that I had a dobutamine stress test in July of 2007 (a chemically induced stress test which is far from pleasant). The trial requires that one be done within a year of trial participation. Which means I am going to have to undergo one again, preferably before the end of the year so as I don't eat a huge bill I can't afford. So I will be making a call to my local cardiologist in just a few minutes to see what can be done. The fact that I have a cardiac history, my 3 ablations to correct that nasty arrhythmia that was taking me down a few years back, with no issues since, the last one was negative. So ..... I can only hope and pray that another one can be covered in this time frame through my insurance, and that I in fact pass it without any complications. It really is an unpleasant experience. They pump you with this chemical to induce a heart rate of a certain level .... (the dobutamine) .... when your heart races at a pace that you may have just run for your life for 3=5 minutes and your heart feels like it is going to explode out of your chest, the feeling of "Yak" is what comes to the forefront of my mind. I am sure, that it will not be the most unpleasant thing I experience in my future, but it is not something I will look forward to.
So..... that is where it sits at the moment. I will most likely not be making my first trip before the first of the year, but .... it is still looking pretty good. I need to pass this test again, which I think I will, but with the stress levels and emotional upset that I have been carrying around with me for the last year, and having to deal with so many other's issues and whining, it all has a tendency to build up and leave a sense of havoc on ones mind and body. So .... maybe there is a trip over the mountain to Sedona one of these days soon for a day trip of walking the paths of healing ..... hell, I rub rocks and hum too if I thought it would make a difference .... LOL .... the scenery in Sedona is so breathtaking, that it sort of acts like the ocean always had for me, a sense of calming to regroup and realize that in the big scheme of things, I am just a small speckle, and to maintain a focus of what I find to be important for me, but a dose of ocean air and the smells of the water and sand, is something I could REALLY use. It was a place my mom and I always went to, often times together, ..... it was sort of weird in hind sight, the ocean, where you see to infinity, hearing the sounds, taking in the smells, listening .... it was truly a calming experience ..... hard for me to explain. Some people go to church, I prefer to go to the coastline and just listen, close my eyes and feel what could be.
Ok ... enough of that sort of chat ... LOL .... I was putting myself to sleep there :D
I have to get it in gear and be slightly productive .... and on that note, wish everyone a wonderful, relaxing weekend !!!!!!
Talk soon,
Peace
et
Thursday, November 26, 2009
HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!!!!
Good Morning .... and a Happy Thanksgiving to all !!!
I am exceptionally thankful for the people in my life. The support, encouragement, friendships, and love and caring expressed to me, more deeply in recent months. I always knew it was there, but when it pours out, it can be incredibly overwhelming.
My bird in the oven, my cider is simmering, my pies are made, veggies are prepped .... now we wait to make ourselves sick....LOL. This time of year always proves to be a feat with blood sugar control, due to all the carb hearty contributions, and sweet treats. I do pace myself ... LOL .... and try to keep a tight control on it. But, like every other day of the year, I do not sweat if a blood sugar goes slightly above my range. It happens, and as long as I get a handle on it quickly, and I do, it is all good. You can't have unrealistic expectations on control, life happens, and as I have always played the game, it is how we deal with it that makes the difference.
Ok ... well .... I need to get in the shower as my tank needs to be refilled (pump change) .... LOL ..... can't tackle these sorts of stressful days for some, I say, this is it, sit down, relax, reminisce, laugh, and enjoy!!! I still have some things to put away and cut up .... veggies for the dip.
I will, again, inform of the call from Debbie, the transplant nurse, later this evening when I have time to myself and the clarity. As I have been thinking about it since yesterday.
Wishing everyone a WONDERFUL day ..... enjoy those you are with and be THANKFUL!!!
love
et
I am exceptionally thankful for the people in my life. The support, encouragement, friendships, and love and caring expressed to me, more deeply in recent months. I always knew it was there, but when it pours out, it can be incredibly overwhelming.
My bird in the oven, my cider is simmering, my pies are made, veggies are prepped .... now we wait to make ourselves sick....LOL. This time of year always proves to be a feat with blood sugar control, due to all the carb hearty contributions, and sweet treats. I do pace myself ... LOL .... and try to keep a tight control on it. But, like every other day of the year, I do not sweat if a blood sugar goes slightly above my range. It happens, and as long as I get a handle on it quickly, and I do, it is all good. You can't have unrealistic expectations on control, life happens, and as I have always played the game, it is how we deal with it that makes the difference.
Ok ... well .... I need to get in the shower as my tank needs to be refilled (pump change) .... LOL ..... can't tackle these sorts of stressful days for some, I say, this is it, sit down, relax, reminisce, laugh, and enjoy!!! I still have some things to put away and cut up .... veggies for the dip.
I will, again, inform of the call from Debbie, the transplant nurse, later this evening when I have time to myself and the clarity. As I have been thinking about it since yesterday.
Wishing everyone a WONDERFUL day ..... enjoy those you are with and be THANKFUL!!!
love
et
Wednesday, November 25, 2009
Turkey Eve
Hello,
I am so ready for bed, a jacuzzi, a deep tissue massage, etc.
It is only Weds. and I am not sure what day I wish it were, but my body hurts beyond belief at the moment. My dinner is prepared and ready to hit the oven in the morning. I still have a few things to prepare that can wait until I am piddling around waiting .... for whatever.
My dad is here tonight, sleeping over ... LMAO ..... this is a first. He, Hilly, and myself did a lot of veggie preparing, and getting the bird all prepped (which was actually pretty funny) and Hilly doing my mom's famous, secret stuffing recipe. Mind you, I never paid much attention to this task, I was always just so incredibly happy to eat the stuff. In any event, I think Hillary did a beautiful job and it is mighty tasty and smells heavenly. My mom would be VERY proud of her !!
The loss of my mother has really set in, for all of us I think. My father is realizing that things have to change, it is inevitable, and I will admit, It SUCKS to get old. We will share dinner and drinks with a cousin and a British friend, and hopefully, my kitchen will be clean when the day ends, and I will be able to go to bed early, and content. I really feel like I would like to have 2, maybe 3 days of just being left alone, not to get out of my comfy clothes, and to just catch up on my sleep, but I know it isn't going to happen. The only time I do get to accomplish this is when I am in a hospital...... LOL ...... just let me be to catch up on my rest.
Okay .... well suddenly, (been 20 minutes since I walked away from the PC) the whole house has gone to bed, I am still doing laundry and dishes. So I will tell you about the phone call I received this afternoon from the transplant nurse coordinator. I was shocked, and a little disappointed. I will fill you in tomorrow.
Rest well, and to all, a Very Happy Thanksgiving !!!
et
I am so ready for bed, a jacuzzi, a deep tissue massage, etc.
It is only Weds. and I am not sure what day I wish it were, but my body hurts beyond belief at the moment. My dinner is prepared and ready to hit the oven in the morning. I still have a few things to prepare that can wait until I am piddling around waiting .... for whatever.
My dad is here tonight, sleeping over ... LMAO ..... this is a first. He, Hilly, and myself did a lot of veggie preparing, and getting the bird all prepped (which was actually pretty funny) and Hilly doing my mom's famous, secret stuffing recipe. Mind you, I never paid much attention to this task, I was always just so incredibly happy to eat the stuff. In any event, I think Hillary did a beautiful job and it is mighty tasty and smells heavenly. My mom would be VERY proud of her !!
The loss of my mother has really set in, for all of us I think. My father is realizing that things have to change, it is inevitable, and I will admit, It SUCKS to get old. We will share dinner and drinks with a cousin and a British friend, and hopefully, my kitchen will be clean when the day ends, and I will be able to go to bed early, and content. I really feel like I would like to have 2, maybe 3 days of just being left alone, not to get out of my comfy clothes, and to just catch up on my sleep, but I know it isn't going to happen. The only time I do get to accomplish this is when I am in a hospital...... LOL ...... just let me be to catch up on my rest.
Okay .... well suddenly, (been 20 minutes since I walked away from the PC) the whole house has gone to bed, I am still doing laundry and dishes. So I will tell you about the phone call I received this afternoon from the transplant nurse coordinator. I was shocked, and a little disappointed. I will fill you in tomorrow.
Rest well, and to all, a Very Happy Thanksgiving !!!
et
Sunday, November 22, 2009
Today's edition
Good Morning my faithful followers !!!
(I love that line :D )
Well ... early this morning I ran down to the market to pick up some muffins and the Sunday paper. Much to my surprise, like a delayed reaction, I began laughing ... sort of a nervous, OMG sort of chuckle. There, plastered across what they refer to as a Mast, the header to the paper, was my mug, and Hillary's laughing head shot!!!!! ..... I was shocked to the point of nausea.
I figured the Courier would just do a little blurb of the original article, not plaster us on the front page with the article to run inside the Vitality section. Which I was thrilled to see shared space with the first robotic kidney surgery done at Flagstaff Medical Center on a Prescott patient. (Very cool stuff). I really do get into this medical stuff, it is absolutely fascinating some of the technology and science that has come into play. A never-ending learning process.
As for me, I do have a lot of cleaning up to do as I will be having my dad, and a couple of friends to dinner on Thanksgiving, and I have to work until Wednesday. I often times don't have the stamina to get all the things on my long list of to-do's completed when I would like them done, therefore, I come across as scattered, often disorganized at times. To me, that is incredibly frustrating. If I have any sort of an episode, I might as well kiss my plans goodbye, as the time lost in recouping back to a normal state, is physically and mentally wearing. I don't believe it was always as bad as it is now. I always thought I bounced back pretty well, at least that is what people have told me. I have been rather lucky in that respect, I have not, as of yet, had any real issues with healing, (been operated on more times than I can count) and seem to make a fairly full recovery. My last surgery being just this past May to have my nose and sinuses fixed. That was such a pleasant ride ..... Not sure how my friends, J&P, tolerated me for those 10 days !!! They are some of the best people !!!
Okay .... well.... Hilly is doing a half-shift today, and I have some cleaning up to do for the holiday. Maggie is shedding like a field of pollen, so she needs to be out and brushed yet again today. She should be bald !!! I can't believe the hair that comes off that animal, but she is just too cute for me to be worried about it.
Things are starting to get rolling here so I really have to keep a focus on the things that need to be addressed, which includes staying on top of my job. There is so much reading involved to stay on top of the codes, and law changes. Always something new.
To everyone, enjoy this wonderful day!!
I hope to get on to address the holiday happenings, and stress levels, and how they can affect blood sugars .... this can be a horrendous time of year for many, then add that chronic disease, and you could literally be screwed!! Stay focused, don't sweat the little stuff, and usually, it all falls into place. KEEP IT REAL !!!
Talk soon!!
et
(I love that line :D )
Well ... early this morning I ran down to the market to pick up some muffins and the Sunday paper. Much to my surprise, like a delayed reaction, I began laughing ... sort of a nervous, OMG sort of chuckle. There, plastered across what they refer to as a Mast, the header to the paper, was my mug, and Hillary's laughing head shot!!!!! ..... I was shocked to the point of nausea.
I figured the Courier would just do a little blurb of the original article, not plaster us on the front page with the article to run inside the Vitality section. Which I was thrilled to see shared space with the first robotic kidney surgery done at Flagstaff Medical Center on a Prescott patient. (Very cool stuff). I really do get into this medical stuff, it is absolutely fascinating some of the technology and science that has come into play. A never-ending learning process.
As for me, I do have a lot of cleaning up to do as I will be having my dad, and a couple of friends to dinner on Thanksgiving, and I have to work until Wednesday. I often times don't have the stamina to get all the things on my long list of to-do's completed when I would like them done, therefore, I come across as scattered, often disorganized at times. To me, that is incredibly frustrating. If I have any sort of an episode, I might as well kiss my plans goodbye, as the time lost in recouping back to a normal state, is physically and mentally wearing. I don't believe it was always as bad as it is now. I always thought I bounced back pretty well, at least that is what people have told me. I have been rather lucky in that respect, I have not, as of yet, had any real issues with healing, (been operated on more times than I can count) and seem to make a fairly full recovery. My last surgery being just this past May to have my nose and sinuses fixed. That was such a pleasant ride ..... Not sure how my friends, J&P, tolerated me for those 10 days !!! They are some of the best people !!!
Okay .... well.... Hilly is doing a half-shift today, and I have some cleaning up to do for the holiday. Maggie is shedding like a field of pollen, so she needs to be out and brushed yet again today. She should be bald !!! I can't believe the hair that comes off that animal, but she is just too cute for me to be worried about it.
Things are starting to get rolling here so I really have to keep a focus on the things that need to be addressed, which includes staying on top of my job. There is so much reading involved to stay on top of the codes, and law changes. Always something new.
To everyone, enjoy this wonderful day!!
I hope to get on to address the holiday happenings, and stress levels, and how they can affect blood sugars .... this can be a horrendous time of year for many, then add that chronic disease, and you could literally be screwed!! Stay focused, don't sweat the little stuff, and usually, it all falls into place. KEEP IT REAL !!!
Talk soon!!
et
Friday, November 20, 2009
Friday
Hi Everyone,
Well..... it is Friday, 5:00 West Coast time, and I haven't heard from the team yet. I am trying to hold on to that "no news is good news" thing.
I haven't felt well this week and am totally exhausted, tired, mentally and physically so I am not going to do anything here tonight.
I am happy the newspaper article was a big hit. I got a voicemail this afternoon stating the same story will run this sunday in the Prescott edition of the Courier !! (www.dcourier.com) A huge reading area !! I believe it will be the same story, not sure if any additions will be made due to the closeness of the yard sale and the fact that I work for one of the largest organizations in the Tri-city area so .... we'll see ... suppose to run in the Vitality Section .... LMAO .... wish I had some of that right about now. :D
Again, thanks to all my faithful followers .... I don't know where I might be without you !!
Enjoy your evening and have a great weekend !!
Love and peace
et
Well..... it is Friday, 5:00 West Coast time, and I haven't heard from the team yet. I am trying to hold on to that "no news is good news" thing.
I haven't felt well this week and am totally exhausted, tired, mentally and physically so I am not going to do anything here tonight.
I am happy the newspaper article was a big hit. I got a voicemail this afternoon stating the same story will run this sunday in the Prescott edition of the Courier !! (www.dcourier.com) A huge reading area !! I believe it will be the same story, not sure if any additions will be made due to the closeness of the yard sale and the fact that I work for one of the largest organizations in the Tri-city area so .... we'll see ... suppose to run in the Vitality Section .... LMAO .... wish I had some of that right about now. :D
Again, thanks to all my faithful followers .... I don't know where I might be without you !!
Enjoy your evening and have a great weekend !!
Love and peace
et
Wednesday, November 18, 2009
Thanks !!
Hi Everyone!!
Sort of a busy day, lots of buzz about the newspaper article. Hillary was thrilled to have one shot looking just like several floating around out there of her mom and her grandma in the same sort of "Bustin' out" sort of laugh!!! Must be genetic !!!
I had 11 hours in today. In part to make up some time, and cause I made a mistake and needed to make it good. I hate it when that happens. Always when there is a hundren things going on and the piles are high. In any event, it got done, the day is over, the coffee is on for morning, and I will be crawling in on those pillows shortly.
I was glad I was able to stay so busy today, as I was and still am, with that underlying nervousness in my stomach at to how my paperwork went before the team today. I am hoping for a call sometime tomorrow. I am really hoping it all went well and the next step is planning the trip for typing, cross matching, and whatever else they might want to do to me prior to the transplant. It is a little nerve rattling to say the least. I am trying to keep my calm, keep my focus as I still have a job to tend to, and a home to try and get into some sort of shape, and then there is that whole "family thing." Which seems to be dwindling away .... as no one seems to want to look at the truth of the matter, and it is easier to make judgements from 3000 miles away to someones mental state, or the demands placed on me to take care of them. So .... I "will do what I need to do" and know I took care of the business at hand, and thanks to all those who were free to throw the judgements.
Alrighty then .... moving right along. It seems most who read it were pleased with the article. I, of course, picked up on typos, missing words, and a couple of misinformative statements, but really no big deal in the big picture. It was a great start to what may be a long road. I have such hope in this procedure. The new technologies, the new drug regimens, steroid free, making it a lot more easy on the kidneys. That was a factor I took pretty seriously, as I have had no kidney issues up to this point. I have been on multiple rounds of steroids at various times to treat upper respiratory infections, and they do a great deal of damage to kidneys and blood sugars. I usually change out my pump every 2/12 to 3 days, and when taking a 10-14 day round of steroids, can change it every day to day and one-half. That is a HUGE difference in the insulin intake and a very good indication of how hard the kidneys are working to rid the body of those inpurities. (Gotta love those little filters !! ) Body humor ...... LMAO ...... goes right along with the language.
Ok ... well .... I am pretty tired, but I do have this great topic for either tomorrow or Fridays' entry. Some of the younger followers might find it cool!! I always admire those that plow forward in the face of adversity. To me, those people are true winners !!! Famous or not, we are all have a story to tell, and it is my hope, that some of my stories of living with this disease, and the damage it can do to the body long-term, even in the best of situations, (which most people don't really encounter on a regular basis, IMHO) can help someone else in some way.
Until tomorrow,
have a wonderful night !!
et
Sort of a busy day, lots of buzz about the newspaper article. Hillary was thrilled to have one shot looking just like several floating around out there of her mom and her grandma in the same sort of "Bustin' out" sort of laugh!!! Must be genetic !!!
I had 11 hours in today. In part to make up some time, and cause I made a mistake and needed to make it good. I hate it when that happens. Always when there is a hundren things going on and the piles are high. In any event, it got done, the day is over, the coffee is on for morning, and I will be crawling in on those pillows shortly.
I was glad I was able to stay so busy today, as I was and still am, with that underlying nervousness in my stomach at to how my paperwork went before the team today. I am hoping for a call sometime tomorrow. I am really hoping it all went well and the next step is planning the trip for typing, cross matching, and whatever else they might want to do to me prior to the transplant. It is a little nerve rattling to say the least. I am trying to keep my calm, keep my focus as I still have a job to tend to, and a home to try and get into some sort of shape, and then there is that whole "family thing." Which seems to be dwindling away .... as no one seems to want to look at the truth of the matter, and it is easier to make judgements from 3000 miles away to someones mental state, or the demands placed on me to take care of them. So .... I "will do what I need to do" and know I took care of the business at hand, and thanks to all those who were free to throw the judgements.
Alrighty then .... moving right along. It seems most who read it were pleased with the article. I, of course, picked up on typos, missing words, and a couple of misinformative statements, but really no big deal in the big picture. It was a great start to what may be a long road. I have such hope in this procedure. The new technologies, the new drug regimens, steroid free, making it a lot more easy on the kidneys. That was a factor I took pretty seriously, as I have had no kidney issues up to this point. I have been on multiple rounds of steroids at various times to treat upper respiratory infections, and they do a great deal of damage to kidneys and blood sugars. I usually change out my pump every 2/12 to 3 days, and when taking a 10-14 day round of steroids, can change it every day to day and one-half. That is a HUGE difference in the insulin intake and a very good indication of how hard the kidneys are working to rid the body of those inpurities. (Gotta love those little filters !! ) Body humor ...... LMAO ...... goes right along with the language.
Ok ... well .... I am pretty tired, but I do have this great topic for either tomorrow or Fridays' entry. Some of the younger followers might find it cool!! I always admire those that plow forward in the face of adversity. To me, those people are true winners !!! Famous or not, we are all have a story to tell, and it is my hope, that some of my stories of living with this disease, and the damage it can do to the body long-term, even in the best of situations, (which most people don't really encounter on a regular basis, IMHO) can help someone else in some way.
Until tomorrow,
have a wonderful night !!
et
Tuesday, November 17, 2009
Front Page ....
Just came in from taking Maggie out for her evening duties ... LOL .... I have had this god awful, lung hacking, eye popping cough most of the night, think it is related to yesterdays chilly day in the office.
Hilly was on her way into town to make fliers when I looked at the end of the driveway ....
"What's that?" ..... she turns around and busts out laughing .... "Why, it looks like the paper!" "Lets just see what it has to say." She really is such a joy to have around with her sense of humor. We tease each other a lot.... but all in good fun. "We're celebrities!!" she says grinning widely.
We hit the front page !! Not that the Chino Review is a big paper, but to hit the front page ... and then 1/2 page continued article further back in the paper, we got our first publicity!!
Earlier this week we were able to secure three local town businesses to host a container for donations. Thanks to Mary at Trendsetter's for her help in our endeavor!! She is one of our MA cronies .... so she gets Hillary and I. There are a couple of more that need to be approached, and hopefully, this article will get things moving.
Tomorrow is the big meeting with the doctors of the team to review my documentation .... I am sort of nervous, only because of the uncertainty that the future holds. I have to keep a positive outlook and just believe .... and I do, that this is an advance I never dreamed I would see.
In any event, we got our hard copy of the paper and we are hoping, it should, print in the online edition as well, which should hit the web by Weds morning.
You can read it at : http://chinovalleyreview.com/index.asp
Thanks for following !!
Rest well !!
et
Hilly was on her way into town to make fliers when I looked at the end of the driveway ....
"What's that?" ..... she turns around and busts out laughing .... "Why, it looks like the paper!" "Lets just see what it has to say." She really is such a joy to have around with her sense of humor. We tease each other a lot.... but all in good fun. "We're celebrities!!" she says grinning widely.
We hit the front page !! Not that the Chino Review is a big paper, but to hit the front page ... and then 1/2 page continued article further back in the paper, we got our first publicity!!
Earlier this week we were able to secure three local town businesses to host a container for donations. Thanks to Mary at Trendsetter's for her help in our endeavor!! She is one of our MA cronies .... so she gets Hillary and I. There are a couple of more that need to be approached, and hopefully, this article will get things moving.
Tomorrow is the big meeting with the doctors of the team to review my documentation .... I am sort of nervous, only because of the uncertainty that the future holds. I have to keep a positive outlook and just believe .... and I do, that this is an advance I never dreamed I would see.
In any event, we got our hard copy of the paper and we are hoping, it should, print in the online edition as well, which should hit the web by Weds morning.
You can read it at : http://chinovalleyreview.com/index.asp
Thanks for following !!
Rest well !!
et
Monday, November 16, 2009
Monday - Monday
Hello ....
It is 6:45 pm here and I hate to admit it, but I am going to bed.
I sat ALL day in an office that was only 55 degrees!!! Cold air blowing down my back, ggggrrrr!!
I went down onto the unit this morning and asked my favorite team of nurses and techs for a blanket .... LMAO .... they even threw it in the dryer for me so I would be toasty. I was quite the fashion statement, wrapped in a blanket with a hot bag around my neck, the blanket up on my head to block the cold air from blowing ....LOL.... I really do love the people I encounter in my job, they really are a sort of twisted, generous extensions of myself, which makes the atmosphere that much more pleasant to be in. Anyway, apparently something wrong with the thermostat ..... ya think, when it says 75 and the actual temp is 20 degrees colder .... I think there is a problem. Needless to say, I developed some dry hacking cough as the day went on and now I am just wiped out. So, I am going to heat my herb bag and go roll up with House .... LOL ....
Sweet dreams to all .... and to all .... a good week.
Two days til the team meets and the story runs. I am a little nervous about all of this.
peace
et
It is 6:45 pm here and I hate to admit it, but I am going to bed.
I sat ALL day in an office that was only 55 degrees!!! Cold air blowing down my back, ggggrrrr!!
I went down onto the unit this morning and asked my favorite team of nurses and techs for a blanket .... LMAO .... they even threw it in the dryer for me so I would be toasty. I was quite the fashion statement, wrapped in a blanket with a hot bag around my neck, the blanket up on my head to block the cold air from blowing ....LOL.... I really do love the people I encounter in my job, they really are a sort of twisted, generous extensions of myself, which makes the atmosphere that much more pleasant to be in. Anyway, apparently something wrong with the thermostat ..... ya think, when it says 75 and the actual temp is 20 degrees colder .... I think there is a problem. Needless to say, I developed some dry hacking cough as the day went on and now I am just wiped out. So, I am going to heat my herb bag and go roll up with House .... LOL ....
Sweet dreams to all .... and to all .... a good week.
Two days til the team meets and the story runs. I am a little nervous about all of this.
peace
et
Sunday, November 15, 2009
Day of Rest
There will be no real posting today ...... only a quote.
"Every emotion must run its course. Each loss must beat its hurt. Every anger must find its peace. The story of your life is told in the voice of the emotions you felt as you were living it. A rich life has its full share of positive and negative emotions. The difference between a happy life and an unhappy one is the way each person comes to terms with pain."
"The pain of life must be processed: the fear trembled, the sadness felt, the anger quickened, and the guilt mourned." Dr. David Viscott MD
Enjoy your day !!
et
"Every emotion must run its course. Each loss must beat its hurt. Every anger must find its peace. The story of your life is told in the voice of the emotions you felt as you were living it. A rich life has its full share of positive and negative emotions. The difference between a happy life and an unhappy one is the way each person comes to terms with pain."
"The pain of life must be processed: the fear trembled, the sadness felt, the anger quickened, and the guilt mourned." Dr. David Viscott MD
Enjoy your day !!
et
Saturday, November 14, 2009
More heartache
Hey .....again ....
Twice in one day, taking a break as I can't find the tool I need to complete the kitchen baseboard. Came in to see what might be going on in the world and try to distract from the phone calls today which has truly opened my eyes to the mentality of my older siblings.
Yes, I am going to vent here as I really only know of the 9 or so people that are faithful followers. They will certainly understand where I am coming from as they have witnessed most of what I have had to cope with over the last 5 or so years.
I tried to call one brother this morning in regard to $$ being sent to my father. He didn't answer his phone..... convienence .... perhaps. So I called another of the older brothers, to get his take, and ask what exactly had been said in a prior conversation with the other brother. Out of 5 brothers, 3 older, 2 younger, I pretty much wrote off the yonger 2 a long time ago as they turned into your basic dysfunctional druck/addicts, and although I had hope for the youngest one, he too, fell into his bottle, saddly to say .... I never see him coming up. I guess not only is high blood pressure hereditary, but so is the alcohol and stupidity.
In any event, I was very much enlighted by the conversation with the brother I did talk to, and completely discusted and totally disappointed in the lying that has come about. So here I am going to state it for anyone who wants to listen or care to know, I AM DONE, with childhood issues that these grown men still have, refuse to deal with for whatever reason, and do nothing but piss and moan about what the other has done, or not done, or thier opinions. My oldest brother, turns out to be one of the biggest issues going. I have not heard from him in almost 21/2 - 3 years, yet I hear from others, YES, I still comunicate with many people on the east coast, so you can't hide what you have said and lack of what you could have done. GROW UP!! As for the others, Iguess if you my my father to be so sharp, or that he needs cash in his pocket so he feels good about himself, maybe you should take him. As his money doesn't take care of what has to be paid, and quite frankly I have extrodinary medical expenses and I have decided that I am no longer going to dish money out of my pocket, have my phone shut off, or allow my daughter to pay for his meds ..... or anything else ..... I have the POA therefore when the doctor makes his diagnosis on dad's mental state come Tuesday, (another day out of work for me, or several hours as I try to schedule his appointments around MY schedule. But, seeing as they don't do anything in regard to actual care and upkeep of the man, they wouldn't think anything else would they. Also, it has become vividly clear that the disease that I live with and have for 37 freaking years, not only does not register on thier compassion scale, what I deal with on a daily basis, or what to do in the event of an emergency, or that it would matter one way or the other as to if I lived or died, then so be it.
Now, I will say this only one more time, I love my brothers, for thier individual personalities, NOT what they have or don't have!!! But, it has become so clear that to have a relationship with them is only toxic. I too, grew up in the same household, I too, remember ruined holidays, drunken ranting at all hours of the night, and am aware that you may have taken the "strap" a few times ..... but ..... LET IT GO ALREADY!!! I can't believe that any of you would carry that along your whole life, or that you blame each other for what the other may or may not have. I don't get it, Ma didn't get it .... but I will say this .... Mike got his chance with mom before she died, Colin got his chance before mom died, Earl, all I have to say to you is that your mother died "worrying about her oldest" ..... for what, cause you couldn't grow up and get past some childhood trauma or "issue." For whatever your reasons, they are YOUR reasons, not mine. The issues I am dealing with in my life over the past year are literally killing me, and I am not going to allow it. Got it??? You can support me, or not, I guess it really doesn't make much difference to me. I have lived without the support before, I can do it again. I cannot believe the support of strangers, friends, coworkers, that have come forward here and all the way from Massachusetts to support me, emotionally, with financial donations, offers to help man a fundraiser, etc. WHY, because apparently they find me to be selfless, giving, caring, inspiring in my strength to overcome what has been placed in front of me at the time to be addressed.
With that being said, I remain grateful for the lessons I have learned thus far in life, I have no guilt, I do not, however, have ANY extra funds to support an elderly man who is losing his mental facilities, (not that he ever had any to start with) and I will not stand by and wait for him to hurt someone else, in his determination to hold on to some childlike ideation of independence. He needs to be watched, over seen, he can't be trusted, he tells tall tales .... and when caught, can't come up with a cover fast enough to save his own ass. FYI I "blew a gasket" on my father today as well. I totally lost my patience, and let it rip. "I only want you to pay for ...... " that is great, but not with my money anymore. I have lost time at work, or had to make time up to accommodate for his doctor appointments, I pay for the stamps, the gas, I write the checks, and I am suppose to give him mad money too !!! Over my dead body, and if it continues this way, my body will in fact be dead, and that was all my father was worried about today, was who was going to take care of him !!!! It is my turn to be selfish .... and to be honest, I am really tired of taking care of other people, all my best years were given to someone else and for what ???? Because .... I thought I could make a difference in some small way. I have been taken advantage of, walked on, over, and through .... you can't help those who don't want to help themselves. Not until this very day ..... did I understand the story my mother told me (I also have these words in her own handwriting) and that was "No one, knew me, cared what my feelings were, thought about how their actions would effect others, if they hurt me, etc." Because we are strong, does not mean we don't have a heart, or that it can't be broken or hurt beyond repair, or that we too, can be lonely even in a house full of people.
I have many fond memories of past years ..... with most of my brothers, on various occasions, and I try to remember those happy memories as opposed to drudging up all the hurt and pain, and for me, often times fear, as a child. The fear was always calmed by one of the older boys, so I understand issues, everyone has them. I choose to cope with mine, my way, head-on .... I find it a little more uplifting ... I am not out to impress one person on this planet, I don't really care what you think of me, I am rarely politically correct as I think that is crap! I sleep soundly at night, and it is now, that I hope to wake up in my mornings. That will not happen if I continue as I have, stressing over things I really shouldn't have to take care of on my own, and miles, shouldn't make that much difference.
I will find out about my transplant by the end of this coming week. You are welcome to come and follow along, make comments, etc, but if you feel the need to withdraw and blame others for something you either have no control over, or choose not to let go of .... well ..... happy life !!
So .... thus ends another happy day in the dysfunctional family of ol' !!
I am at a point, where I really need to be thinking of me, my mental and physical health, mental health especially, as that is what has carried me this far in a life that was to have been cut short a long time ago. Anxiety is high right now waiting for the transplant team decision, and this is where my future lies right now. I am ready to plow forward, with or without the support of my siblings. I hope and pray (Ya, me ... I pray.... Imagine that!!) it will be there, but I don't want it if it is going to come with constant bickering !!! You can all keep that to yourselves, Thank you. I wish none of you harm, only that you will face whatever it is that eats at you, and come to peace with what we grew up with, and what has become of us ..... .... one might be reminded that sometimes, emotional support means more than any money could ever buy. Something to perhaps ponder. Even if the transplant doesn't work for me, at least I can say I tried, and that by me trying, perhaps another life will be extended in the near future, so who did I bring harm too, only myself as my daughter is aware of the risks, but is all too aware of what has been going on in the last couple of years with my health and its quick deterioration. Yet I continue to live my life, go to work, continue my education, and not really get to do anything I once enjoyed for reasons that either revolve around lack of money, or taking care of someone elses needs.
How will you remember me???
Enjoy your evening !!
peace and love
et
Twice in one day, taking a break as I can't find the tool I need to complete the kitchen baseboard. Came in to see what might be going on in the world and try to distract from the phone calls today which has truly opened my eyes to the mentality of my older siblings.
Yes, I am going to vent here as I really only know of the 9 or so people that are faithful followers. They will certainly understand where I am coming from as they have witnessed most of what I have had to cope with over the last 5 or so years.
I tried to call one brother this morning in regard to $$ being sent to my father. He didn't answer his phone..... convienence .... perhaps. So I called another of the older brothers, to get his take, and ask what exactly had been said in a prior conversation with the other brother. Out of 5 brothers, 3 older, 2 younger, I pretty much wrote off the yonger 2 a long time ago as they turned into your basic dysfunctional druck/addicts, and although I had hope for the youngest one, he too, fell into his bottle, saddly to say .... I never see him coming up. I guess not only is high blood pressure hereditary, but so is the alcohol and stupidity.
In any event, I was very much enlighted by the conversation with the brother I did talk to, and completely discusted and totally disappointed in the lying that has come about. So here I am going to state it for anyone who wants to listen or care to know, I AM DONE, with childhood issues that these grown men still have, refuse to deal with for whatever reason, and do nothing but piss and moan about what the other has done, or not done, or thier opinions. My oldest brother, turns out to be one of the biggest issues going. I have not heard from him in almost 21/2 - 3 years, yet I hear from others, YES, I still comunicate with many people on the east coast, so you can't hide what you have said and lack of what you could have done. GROW UP!! As for the others, Iguess if you my my father to be so sharp, or that he needs cash in his pocket so he feels good about himself, maybe you should take him. As his money doesn't take care of what has to be paid, and quite frankly I have extrodinary medical expenses and I have decided that I am no longer going to dish money out of my pocket, have my phone shut off, or allow my daughter to pay for his meds ..... or anything else ..... I have the POA therefore when the doctor makes his diagnosis on dad's mental state come Tuesday, (another day out of work for me, or several hours as I try to schedule his appointments around MY schedule. But, seeing as they don't do anything in regard to actual care and upkeep of the man, they wouldn't think anything else would they. Also, it has become vividly clear that the disease that I live with and have for 37 freaking years, not only does not register on thier compassion scale, what I deal with on a daily basis, or what to do in the event of an emergency, or that it would matter one way or the other as to if I lived or died, then so be it.
Now, I will say this only one more time, I love my brothers, for thier individual personalities, NOT what they have or don't have!!! But, it has become so clear that to have a relationship with them is only toxic. I too, grew up in the same household, I too, remember ruined holidays, drunken ranting at all hours of the night, and am aware that you may have taken the "strap" a few times ..... but ..... LET IT GO ALREADY!!! I can't believe that any of you would carry that along your whole life, or that you blame each other for what the other may or may not have. I don't get it, Ma didn't get it .... but I will say this .... Mike got his chance with mom before she died, Colin got his chance before mom died, Earl, all I have to say to you is that your mother died "worrying about her oldest" ..... for what, cause you couldn't grow up and get past some childhood trauma or "issue." For whatever your reasons, they are YOUR reasons, not mine. The issues I am dealing with in my life over the past year are literally killing me, and I am not going to allow it. Got it??? You can support me, or not, I guess it really doesn't make much difference to me. I have lived without the support before, I can do it again. I cannot believe the support of strangers, friends, coworkers, that have come forward here and all the way from Massachusetts to support me, emotionally, with financial donations, offers to help man a fundraiser, etc. WHY, because apparently they find me to be selfless, giving, caring, inspiring in my strength to overcome what has been placed in front of me at the time to be addressed.
With that being said, I remain grateful for the lessons I have learned thus far in life, I have no guilt, I do not, however, have ANY extra funds to support an elderly man who is losing his mental facilities, (not that he ever had any to start with) and I will not stand by and wait for him to hurt someone else, in his determination to hold on to some childlike ideation of independence. He needs to be watched, over seen, he can't be trusted, he tells tall tales .... and when caught, can't come up with a cover fast enough to save his own ass. FYI I "blew a gasket" on my father today as well. I totally lost my patience, and let it rip. "I only want you to pay for ...... " that is great, but not with my money anymore. I have lost time at work, or had to make time up to accommodate for his doctor appointments, I pay for the stamps, the gas, I write the checks, and I am suppose to give him mad money too !!! Over my dead body, and if it continues this way, my body will in fact be dead, and that was all my father was worried about today, was who was going to take care of him !!!! It is my turn to be selfish .... and to be honest, I am really tired of taking care of other people, all my best years were given to someone else and for what ???? Because .... I thought I could make a difference in some small way. I have been taken advantage of, walked on, over, and through .... you can't help those who don't want to help themselves. Not until this very day ..... did I understand the story my mother told me (I also have these words in her own handwriting) and that was "No one, knew me, cared what my feelings were, thought about how their actions would effect others, if they hurt me, etc." Because we are strong, does not mean we don't have a heart, or that it can't be broken or hurt beyond repair, or that we too, can be lonely even in a house full of people.
I have many fond memories of past years ..... with most of my brothers, on various occasions, and I try to remember those happy memories as opposed to drudging up all the hurt and pain, and for me, often times fear, as a child. The fear was always calmed by one of the older boys, so I understand issues, everyone has them. I choose to cope with mine, my way, head-on .... I find it a little more uplifting ... I am not out to impress one person on this planet, I don't really care what you think of me, I am rarely politically correct as I think that is crap! I sleep soundly at night, and it is now, that I hope to wake up in my mornings. That will not happen if I continue as I have, stressing over things I really shouldn't have to take care of on my own, and miles, shouldn't make that much difference.
I will find out about my transplant by the end of this coming week. You are welcome to come and follow along, make comments, etc, but if you feel the need to withdraw and blame others for something you either have no control over, or choose not to let go of .... well ..... happy life !!
So .... thus ends another happy day in the dysfunctional family of ol' !!
I am at a point, where I really need to be thinking of me, my mental and physical health, mental health especially, as that is what has carried me this far in a life that was to have been cut short a long time ago. Anxiety is high right now waiting for the transplant team decision, and this is where my future lies right now. I am ready to plow forward, with or without the support of my siblings. I hope and pray (Ya, me ... I pray.... Imagine that!!) it will be there, but I don't want it if it is going to come with constant bickering !!! You can all keep that to yourselves, Thank you. I wish none of you harm, only that you will face whatever it is that eats at you, and come to peace with what we grew up with, and what has become of us ..... .... one might be reminded that sometimes, emotional support means more than any money could ever buy. Something to perhaps ponder. Even if the transplant doesn't work for me, at least I can say I tried, and that by me trying, perhaps another life will be extended in the near future, so who did I bring harm too, only myself as my daughter is aware of the risks, but is all too aware of what has been going on in the last couple of years with my health and its quick deterioration. Yet I continue to live my life, go to work, continue my education, and not really get to do anything I once enjoyed for reasons that either revolve around lack of money, or taking care of someone elses needs.
How will you remember me???
Enjoy your evening !!
peace and love
et
Diabetes awareness month
http://www.jdrf.org/index.cfm?page_id=112126
The above link is to the speech before congress given recently my Mary Tyler Moore, who is the International Chairperson for the JDRF. She has a recently published new book out detailing her life living with Type 1 diabetes, and although she was diagnosed in her 30's, she has suffered with this disease approximately 40 years. With me at 37 years, MTM at 40 years .... well ... you can make your own comparisons .... but the outlook begins to look extremely bleak. All the proceeds from this book are being donated to the JDRF !!!! How wonderful is that ??!!
So with that being said, join me in supporting the JDRF during the month of November, which is diabetes awareness month.
Coming up on December 12th is our "Mungo Yard Sale" .... LOL ..... to benefit me and to help with the travel expense, which will no doubt be starting fast after next week. This past week has been very difficult for me, with remembering my mom, the transplant call, everyday life of keeping up with work, my father, having to go to the dentist (one more visit with him and I am transplant ready!) I am anxious, nervous, disappointed in my siblings (I know, I have no control over others behaviors), but it hurts to think that they can be so self-absorbed. Therefore, I have decided that I will inform them, and after that, the call is theirs. Just to reaffirm an earlier post, EVERYONE has issues in life, and to reference one of my favorite quotes "Life is not what it's suppose to be, it's what it is, it is how we deal with it that makes the difference!" I don't remember who actually said it, but I had it on my fridge for years ..... way back when, and it has always held true for me. In my heart, I know my brothers love me, and perhaps will even miss me when I am gone..... LOL .... but I have learned in the loss of many friends, lost way to early, with so much to give, that life doesn't wait for anyone. To hold grudges, for whatever the "issue" is not my method .... do I believe one should shed themselves of toxic relationships ?? You bet your ass I do, I have had to shed a couple in my own life, they just did not help my health at all..... and we have no control over others actions or behaviors ..... do what you have to, try not to intentionally hurt others, but let it go and move on with the future. This is where I am at.
There is a potentially new beginning for me ..... that is so incredibly scary.... yet exciting as well. The hopes of being able to live ..... without .... or with a whole lot less poking .... would be something I have never know. My finger tips have these little purple calluses on the 3 fingers of each hand which I use repeatedly to check my blood sugars 6-8 time each day. Sometimes, they don't even bleed ..... LOL ..... "man hands!"
Anyway .... just to recap, any funds acquired to help in my travel for this life changing journey which are not used at the end of the trial period, will also be donated to the JDRF for continued research. They really have made remarkable progress in the research for a cure, and I am a HUGE advocate for the stem cell aspect. That is where the "C" will be found for many devastating diseases, including the Parkinson's which my mother was suffering from in the end. Stem cell research needs to be allowed to help the next generation ..... I realize for many it is a moral issue, perhaps when one of these deadly diseases hits someone close to them, they will see the other side of the story. It can be a difficult call .... that is why "ETHICS" are a great thing.
Okay ..... it is 6:30 am now and I have some cleaning to do as my house looks like Iwo Jima !!! LOL ...... There are times, most days actually, I just don't have thy physical energy or muscle strength to get everything I WANT done.... so I do one of two things....... push myself hard and pay big time, or say "F" it ..... it will be there tomorrow. (I learned that one from my mom ... LOL) .... and if it bothers you, feel free to clean it up !!! :D
Wishing all a wonderful weekend !!!
Next week will no doubt be another fun filled, anticipating week. Thanks for following !!!
The above link is to the speech before congress given recently my Mary Tyler Moore, who is the International Chairperson for the JDRF. She has a recently published new book out detailing her life living with Type 1 diabetes, and although she was diagnosed in her 30's, she has suffered with this disease approximately 40 years. With me at 37 years, MTM at 40 years .... well ... you can make your own comparisons .... but the outlook begins to look extremely bleak. All the proceeds from this book are being donated to the JDRF !!!! How wonderful is that ??!!
So with that being said, join me in supporting the JDRF during the month of November, which is diabetes awareness month.
Coming up on December 12th is our "Mungo Yard Sale" .... LOL ..... to benefit me and to help with the travel expense, which will no doubt be starting fast after next week. This past week has been very difficult for me, with remembering my mom, the transplant call, everyday life of keeping up with work, my father, having to go to the dentist (one more visit with him and I am transplant ready!) I am anxious, nervous, disappointed in my siblings (I know, I have no control over others behaviors), but it hurts to think that they can be so self-absorbed. Therefore, I have decided that I will inform them, and after that, the call is theirs. Just to reaffirm an earlier post, EVERYONE has issues in life, and to reference one of my favorite quotes "Life is not what it's suppose to be, it's what it is, it is how we deal with it that makes the difference!" I don't remember who actually said it, but I had it on my fridge for years ..... way back when, and it has always held true for me. In my heart, I know my brothers love me, and perhaps will even miss me when I am gone..... LOL .... but I have learned in the loss of many friends, lost way to early, with so much to give, that life doesn't wait for anyone. To hold grudges, for whatever the "issue" is not my method .... do I believe one should shed themselves of toxic relationships ?? You bet your ass I do, I have had to shed a couple in my own life, they just did not help my health at all..... and we have no control over others actions or behaviors ..... do what you have to, try not to intentionally hurt others, but let it go and move on with the future. This is where I am at.
There is a potentially new beginning for me ..... that is so incredibly scary.... yet exciting as well. The hopes of being able to live ..... without .... or with a whole lot less poking .... would be something I have never know. My finger tips have these little purple calluses on the 3 fingers of each hand which I use repeatedly to check my blood sugars 6-8 time each day. Sometimes, they don't even bleed ..... LOL ..... "man hands!"
Anyway .... just to recap, any funds acquired to help in my travel for this life changing journey which are not used at the end of the trial period, will also be donated to the JDRF for continued research. They really have made remarkable progress in the research for a cure, and I am a HUGE advocate for the stem cell aspect. That is where the "C" will be found for many devastating diseases, including the Parkinson's which my mother was suffering from in the end. Stem cell research needs to be allowed to help the next generation ..... I realize for many it is a moral issue, perhaps when one of these deadly diseases hits someone close to them, they will see the other side of the story. It can be a difficult call .... that is why "ETHICS" are a great thing.
Okay ..... it is 6:30 am now and I have some cleaning to do as my house looks like Iwo Jima !!! LOL ...... There are times, most days actually, I just don't have thy physical energy or muscle strength to get everything I WANT done.... so I do one of two things....... push myself hard and pay big time, or say "F" it ..... it will be there tomorrow. (I learned that one from my mom ... LOL) .... and if it bothers you, feel free to clean it up !!! :D
Wishing all a wonderful weekend !!!
Next week will no doubt be another fun filled, anticipating week. Thanks for following !!!
Thursday, November 12, 2009
Emotions gone wild !!
Hello ....
Well ... yesterday I thought I made a post, I know I had this big long list of complications and the digestive system ... upon logging on here, I see it didn't get posted ..... hmmmmmm ..... I will say only one thing, it was either due to Maggie interruption, or I just completely forgot to hit post. Now, if that indicates to you what sort of day I had yesterday ...... run with it!!!
Yesterday was a roller coaster of emotions for me. I was and am not prepared to deal with the wide range of emotions flowing at the moment. Yesterday marked the one year anniversary of my mother's service, and I actually spoke at this event. On top of that it was Veteran's Day, I always get a tad sappy at this mile marker anyway, to remember all who have served, those family members I have who continue to serve, and where we might be, or what language might be the prominent one of the day, if not for these individuals.
That being said, I was off from work yesterday (I hate days off in the middle of the week as I thought today was Monday all over again). I had a fairly mellow morning, cleaning up, collecting crap for the yard sale, dancing with Maggie ... LOL ..... she is part of my family .... and she is a good dancer for a lil'one!! :D Hillary had classes yesterday and was home about noon'ish when we went back into town to pick up some food. Prior to that ride, my mom had been weighing heavy on my heart and mind, I miss that woman so much that words cannot begin to describe my void. Some people often thought that our relationship was too close. I don't believe that, I believe and wish that every woman could have the sort of relationship I had with my mother. It was as a card I gave her once said, "Ours is a strange and wonderful relationship, You're strange, and I'm wonderful!" Oh how we laughed at that one ..... and so many other things in life that it made those few rough, rocky patches seem like a small speed bump!! My missing her went deep yesterday, as I had mentioned before, I have not had a really knee dropping cry since she left this earth.
Well .... it hit yesterday. At approximately 3:15 pm Arizona time yesterday my cell phone rang. Not sure why I answered it as I didn't recognize the number. On the other end of the phone was the nursing coordinator for the transplant team. I must have sounded odd as she asked me if I was alright, I said yes. She continued to tell me that yes, it was a holiday, but she had gone into the office to do some things while it was quiet. She wanted to let me know that her fax apparently had lots of paperwork, documentation on it with my name on it. ..... (my gut became a little more queasy), she wanted to let me know that all my paperwork had now been received, and that the "Team meets on Wednesdays to review the cases up for transplant (Now I can feel not only my gut ready to blow, but my knees have become shaky). She continues to tell me that I will be reviewed on Wednesday and a decision will be made as to a final decision as to whether I will be a good candidate. She proceeds with "I think you are and excellent candidate!" (I thought I was going to pass out!!!! It was like reality had hit me from behind all in a 6 hour period. She told me that I should be hearing about my "Virgin Trip" to SF for all the typing and cross matching tests (a 3-4 day trip). Then it will be ........ WAIT ...... for a suitable donor.
I have so many questions .... when I hung up the phone I went to my knees. One, cause I wished my mother could be here to share this with me. I know she would be excited. She used to say she would "never see a cure in her lifetime" and she didn't. I didn't really expect research to come this far either in the time I have been following the research (over 20 years). You always hear about these remarkable new advances ..... but they neglect to tell us that they are in monkeys or rats, and it could be YEARS .... before they ever get to be used or tried on a human being. Hillary came running across the house as at this point she can hear me bawling like a baby ....a teething baby..... God I was wailing !!! It was like a sea of emotions, built up for so long, hit me.
To add to that, this afternoon a reporter from the hometown newspaper came by the clinic to do a photo op and a few questions with Hillary, myself, and my "support team", and my new fill-in family. It is to print in next Wednesdays paper. I guess what struck me as odd this afternoon was when the woman asked me if I was afraid to die. I answered calmly, and with conviction that I have already hung out on the door step a few times and No, I am not afraid to die, I am afraid of the mess I will leave behind. She seemed shocked to hear my answer. Not 15 minutes earlier I had been on the edge of tears telling Hilly and my coworkers I wasn't sure I could do this, (the publicity stuff). Yes, I want to share my story, I want awareness to be known, I want change, I want a better future for kids diagnosed today, that they not have to go through childhood, adolescents, young adulthood with such a stigma. I was not contagious then, I am not contagious now, and no kid should have to cope with such harsh realities.
Okay .... so we all have the big picture now ??? I am on the cusp of a potentially new future for myself..... and with hope for a real cure for the kids of tomorrow. When I asked Hillary after the interview was over what she thought about that comment (death) ... she looked at me and asked "it is a reality mom, did you not think of it?" To answer her question, I did think about it. It is a fact .... I weighed both the risks I am dealing with now, with the risks of the transplant, matched with the benefits of living as I am, knowing full well I could drop to a critically low blood sugar and NOT wake up ..... I have been so incredibly lucky in the sense that someone always picks up on my "stupidity" as we have dubbed the episodes. I am all too aware of the potential of failure with the transplant, but it is a risk I am willing to take and even if it should fail with me (an option I refuse to look at as I don't like to be that negative) I am helping research take the next step. Surely, that must be worth something ?????
I don't consider myself a very religious person, I do, however, have some deep seeded faith in a God that has been pretty good to me in the overall scheme of things... and I have plenty of scars to show for it!! Battle wounds I like to call them .... as for without these battles I have had to face, basically on my own, from deep within me, I find my mother ...... she was always quietly routing me on...... she knew how to do that with remarkable grace. As a mother myself, I don't know how she did it for so many years. As I learned as I aged, and my mother became more and more open about her thoughts, her fears, things she overcame in her own life, how very much alike we were in our inner strength. She often told me she wished she could have been more like me, I never understood that comment, as it was her, that I learned this grace under fire strength. I ache heavily for her presence at this time, sitting here typing through my tears I would so love to have her sharing this with me ..... and all I have is her spirit, and with that I will continue my fight onward. (hoping any typos will be overlooked tonight mom :)
To my extended family and friends; who have been so incredibly gracious with your support, I, nor my words, could ever convey my gratitude and heartfelt appreciation for your love and support.
With that .... I am emotionally exhausted and at this time will retire to a more peaceful place in my mind. I can't imagine what lies ahead for me .... and with that, need to get my rest.
Love to all !!
et
Well ... yesterday I thought I made a post, I know I had this big long list of complications and the digestive system ... upon logging on here, I see it didn't get posted ..... hmmmmmm ..... I will say only one thing, it was either due to Maggie interruption, or I just completely forgot to hit post. Now, if that indicates to you what sort of day I had yesterday ...... run with it!!!
Yesterday was a roller coaster of emotions for me. I was and am not prepared to deal with the wide range of emotions flowing at the moment. Yesterday marked the one year anniversary of my mother's service, and I actually spoke at this event. On top of that it was Veteran's Day, I always get a tad sappy at this mile marker anyway, to remember all who have served, those family members I have who continue to serve, and where we might be, or what language might be the prominent one of the day, if not for these individuals.
That being said, I was off from work yesterday (I hate days off in the middle of the week as I thought today was Monday all over again). I had a fairly mellow morning, cleaning up, collecting crap for the yard sale, dancing with Maggie ... LOL ..... she is part of my family .... and she is a good dancer for a lil'one!! :D Hillary had classes yesterday and was home about noon'ish when we went back into town to pick up some food. Prior to that ride, my mom had been weighing heavy on my heart and mind, I miss that woman so much that words cannot begin to describe my void. Some people often thought that our relationship was too close. I don't believe that, I believe and wish that every woman could have the sort of relationship I had with my mother. It was as a card I gave her once said, "Ours is a strange and wonderful relationship, You're strange, and I'm wonderful!" Oh how we laughed at that one ..... and so many other things in life that it made those few rough, rocky patches seem like a small speed bump!! My missing her went deep yesterday, as I had mentioned before, I have not had a really knee dropping cry since she left this earth.
Well .... it hit yesterday. At approximately 3:15 pm Arizona time yesterday my cell phone rang. Not sure why I answered it as I didn't recognize the number. On the other end of the phone was the nursing coordinator for the transplant team. I must have sounded odd as she asked me if I was alright, I said yes. She continued to tell me that yes, it was a holiday, but she had gone into the office to do some things while it was quiet. She wanted to let me know that her fax apparently had lots of paperwork, documentation on it with my name on it. ..... (my gut became a little more queasy), she wanted to let me know that all my paperwork had now been received, and that the "Team meets on Wednesdays to review the cases up for transplant (Now I can feel not only my gut ready to blow, but my knees have become shaky). She continues to tell me that I will be reviewed on Wednesday and a decision will be made as to a final decision as to whether I will be a good candidate. She proceeds with "I think you are and excellent candidate!" (I thought I was going to pass out!!!! It was like reality had hit me from behind all in a 6 hour period. She told me that I should be hearing about my "Virgin Trip" to SF for all the typing and cross matching tests (a 3-4 day trip). Then it will be ........ WAIT ...... for a suitable donor.
I have so many questions .... when I hung up the phone I went to my knees. One, cause I wished my mother could be here to share this with me. I know she would be excited. She used to say she would "never see a cure in her lifetime" and she didn't. I didn't really expect research to come this far either in the time I have been following the research (over 20 years). You always hear about these remarkable new advances ..... but they neglect to tell us that they are in monkeys or rats, and it could be YEARS .... before they ever get to be used or tried on a human being. Hillary came running across the house as at this point she can hear me bawling like a baby ....a teething baby..... God I was wailing !!! It was like a sea of emotions, built up for so long, hit me.
To add to that, this afternoon a reporter from the hometown newspaper came by the clinic to do a photo op and a few questions with Hillary, myself, and my "support team", and my new fill-in family. It is to print in next Wednesdays paper. I guess what struck me as odd this afternoon was when the woman asked me if I was afraid to die. I answered calmly, and with conviction that I have already hung out on the door step a few times and No, I am not afraid to die, I am afraid of the mess I will leave behind. She seemed shocked to hear my answer. Not 15 minutes earlier I had been on the edge of tears telling Hilly and my coworkers I wasn't sure I could do this, (the publicity stuff). Yes, I want to share my story, I want awareness to be known, I want change, I want a better future for kids diagnosed today, that they not have to go through childhood, adolescents, young adulthood with such a stigma. I was not contagious then, I am not contagious now, and no kid should have to cope with such harsh realities.
Okay .... so we all have the big picture now ??? I am on the cusp of a potentially new future for myself..... and with hope for a real cure for the kids of tomorrow. When I asked Hillary after the interview was over what she thought about that comment (death) ... she looked at me and asked "it is a reality mom, did you not think of it?" To answer her question, I did think about it. It is a fact .... I weighed both the risks I am dealing with now, with the risks of the transplant, matched with the benefits of living as I am, knowing full well I could drop to a critically low blood sugar and NOT wake up ..... I have been so incredibly lucky in the sense that someone always picks up on my "stupidity" as we have dubbed the episodes. I am all too aware of the potential of failure with the transplant, but it is a risk I am willing to take and even if it should fail with me (an option I refuse to look at as I don't like to be that negative) I am helping research take the next step. Surely, that must be worth something ?????
I don't consider myself a very religious person, I do, however, have some deep seeded faith in a God that has been pretty good to me in the overall scheme of things... and I have plenty of scars to show for it!! Battle wounds I like to call them .... as for without these battles I have had to face, basically on my own, from deep within me, I find my mother ...... she was always quietly routing me on...... she knew how to do that with remarkable grace. As a mother myself, I don't know how she did it for so many years. As I learned as I aged, and my mother became more and more open about her thoughts, her fears, things she overcame in her own life, how very much alike we were in our inner strength. She often told me she wished she could have been more like me, I never understood that comment, as it was her, that I learned this grace under fire strength. I ache heavily for her presence at this time, sitting here typing through my tears I would so love to have her sharing this with me ..... and all I have is her spirit, and with that I will continue my fight onward. (hoping any typos will be overlooked tonight mom :)
To my extended family and friends; who have been so incredibly gracious with your support, I, nor my words, could ever convey my gratitude and heartfelt appreciation for your love and support.
With that .... I am emotionally exhausted and at this time will retire to a more peaceful place in my mind. I can't imagine what lies ahead for me .... and with that, need to get my rest.
Love to all !!
et
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
Complications
Good evening my followers .... LOL ....
I needed to laugh right there, as my lovely pup just had me doing circles around the island in the kitchen trying to get something out of her mouth she shouldn't have had in the first place. She knows she is in trouble when I yell .... and I yell when she has me (the so-called alpha dog) doing circles with no way out, pissed off. After barracading her with the bar stools, the chairs from the table, and a running vacume .... LOL .... I got what she had, a magnet, out of her mouth and she proceeded in defeat to her crate. Now I have a pounding headache as I think I have a cold, and it was sort of hard to breathe chasing her around for 20 minutes. Yes, I love my companion, but I sure will be happy when she throws on a few of those "dog years" and catches up with me and mellows out a bit.
Anyway .... thought I would come into the office and chill out for a bit. Topic tonight, complications. As I ate my dinner two hours ago, a cassarole I made last night, and has proceeded to make me sick to my stomach because it tasted so good, but doesn't digest as normal people do.
In 1995-96 I was diagnosed with a complication called "Gastroparesis," a paralized digestive system, also known as a motility disorder. At first, after a multitude of very unpleasant tests from head to .... well ... that area a foot or so from our toes .... LOL ... I was told by a gastroenterologist in Burlington MA to "invest in a good blender." Certain quotes I remember so vividly as they are such assinine comments to be made by a physician. Eating became a very mundane experience. Most of what I was eating at the time, was in a soft, liquid form due to the fact my digestion doesn't always happen. Like tonight, hehehe .... I made this awesome cassarole, italian sausage, rice, peppers, onions, mushrooms..... it was delious!! but it is killing me right now. I feel like I am about to give birth to that new found "FOOD BABY." Due to the fact what I eat, must be matched to an insulin bolus, it can be a juggling act to determine how long it "might" take to digest, this in turn can cause a crashing or exacerbation of my blood sugars. An example, Pizza !! I don't eat it, every time I do, it is like an automatic trip to the ER before the night is over. The fact that bread is a complex carbohydrate, it takes forever for my system to digest it. I don't eat a lot of bread. Over the years I have learned to tweek my diet to accomadate my lack of digestion. One would think I would be considerably thinner but .... not the case. Things can get "hung up" for days ..... (I'n trying to give you a picture here, are you seeing it, I hope so, cause I would hate to have to get graphic with you all here)
I did do the liquid/soft diet for a couple of years, and even today, would prefer to keep my nutrition either supplemental (of which I take two) and or liquid/soft grazing. For those that may be interested, I am a pretty cheap date ... LOL .... a salad, a bloody mary, and/or a perrier and I am pretty much set !! I have been on several motility drugs over the years to try and help this problem, the one that worked best for me was removed from the market due to "sudden death" and heart issues. Of course, then I was tried on Reglan, I had violent reaction to that and landed head first in a dryer at the apartment complex in which we were living at the time. I then did a 5 year run on Erythromycin ..... yes.... an antibiotic which usually makes people sick to their stomachs. I took one tablet before every meal and again at bedtime, the theory being that if you takes these meds prior to a meal, you will get things moving along, thus helping the digestion process along. Well .... guess it worked for a while, but with any long-term antibiotic use you run into other issues. Which were getting pretty old. Antibiotics can throw out the normal flora in the digestive tract giving way to other infections. So that was stopped after 5 years. That left nothing for me to do except some natural/herbal research. I added massive amounts of fiber in capsule or liquid form (because they help the process) ....
I have to cut this one short, but will continue in a while as Maggie is on the run again. Sorry, I just can't stay mad at her for very long.
I needed to laugh right there, as my lovely pup just had me doing circles around the island in the kitchen trying to get something out of her mouth she shouldn't have had in the first place. She knows she is in trouble when I yell .... and I yell when she has me (the so-called alpha dog) doing circles with no way out, pissed off. After barracading her with the bar stools, the chairs from the table, and a running vacume .... LOL .... I got what she had, a magnet, out of her mouth and she proceeded in defeat to her crate. Now I have a pounding headache as I think I have a cold, and it was sort of hard to breathe chasing her around for 20 minutes. Yes, I love my companion, but I sure will be happy when she throws on a few of those "dog years" and catches up with me and mellows out a bit.
Anyway .... thought I would come into the office and chill out for a bit. Topic tonight, complications. As I ate my dinner two hours ago, a cassarole I made last night, and has proceeded to make me sick to my stomach because it tasted so good, but doesn't digest as normal people do.
In 1995-96 I was diagnosed with a complication called "Gastroparesis," a paralized digestive system, also known as a motility disorder. At first, after a multitude of very unpleasant tests from head to .... well ... that area a foot or so from our toes .... LOL ... I was told by a gastroenterologist in Burlington MA to "invest in a good blender." Certain quotes I remember so vividly as they are such assinine comments to be made by a physician. Eating became a very mundane experience. Most of what I was eating at the time, was in a soft, liquid form due to the fact my digestion doesn't always happen. Like tonight, hehehe .... I made this awesome cassarole, italian sausage, rice, peppers, onions, mushrooms..... it was delious!! but it is killing me right now. I feel like I am about to give birth to that new found "FOOD BABY." Due to the fact what I eat, must be matched to an insulin bolus, it can be a juggling act to determine how long it "might" take to digest, this in turn can cause a crashing or exacerbation of my blood sugars. An example, Pizza !! I don't eat it, every time I do, it is like an automatic trip to the ER before the night is over. The fact that bread is a complex carbohydrate, it takes forever for my system to digest it. I don't eat a lot of bread. Over the years I have learned to tweek my diet to accomadate my lack of digestion. One would think I would be considerably thinner but .... not the case. Things can get "hung up" for days ..... (I'n trying to give you a picture here, are you seeing it, I hope so, cause I would hate to have to get graphic with you all here)
I did do the liquid/soft diet for a couple of years, and even today, would prefer to keep my nutrition either supplemental (of which I take two) and or liquid/soft grazing. For those that may be interested, I am a pretty cheap date ... LOL .... a salad, a bloody mary, and/or a perrier and I am pretty much set !! I have been on several motility drugs over the years to try and help this problem, the one that worked best for me was removed from the market due to "sudden death" and heart issues. Of course, then I was tried on Reglan, I had violent reaction to that and landed head first in a dryer at the apartment complex in which we were living at the time. I then did a 5 year run on Erythromycin ..... yes.... an antibiotic which usually makes people sick to their stomachs. I took one tablet before every meal and again at bedtime, the theory being that if you takes these meds prior to a meal, you will get things moving along, thus helping the digestion process along. Well .... guess it worked for a while, but with any long-term antibiotic use you run into other issues. Which were getting pretty old. Antibiotics can throw out the normal flora in the digestive tract giving way to other infections. So that was stopped after 5 years. That left nothing for me to do except some natural/herbal research. I added massive amounts of fiber in capsule or liquid form (because they help the process) ....
I have to cut this one short, but will continue in a while as Maggie is on the run again. Sorry, I just can't stay mad at her for very long.
Monday, November 9, 2009
Exciting News !!
(Hillary, my baby girl and biggest fan, and myself taken last month)
Hi Everyone!!
I spoke with the local newspaper this morning. The woman I spoke with is going to meet Hillary, myself, and my boss, (my other co-workers as well) on Thursday morning at the clinic to take some photos for a newspaper story. She is going to collect a little "social" input on me I guess, as well as focus on the proposal letter that Hillary had written to muster support. She is also going to spread the article to two other local newspapers for running of the cause. The way the area is set up out here, us living in Chino Valley, me working in Prescott Valley, and Hilly working for the hospital in Prescott, we have what we call here as the Quad-city area covered !!!!
This is a little nerve-racking for me as we wind down to the ultimate "Virgin" trip to San Francisco. Being a comic and being told I missed my calling, it really has been my method of coping over the years. Under it all, I like my privacy, so to be throwing myself out there, is a bit humbling, and an odd feeling to be described as "Inspiring." .... I'm sorry, but I really have to laugh at this comment. I am truly touched that the people I have encountered in my life, the ones who have experienced me in the full sense of the term, find me inspiring. I am going about life as I believe we all should. Hopeful for a better tomorrow, for everyone.
As far as this cause, yes, I hope to benefit with the travel funds to accomplish the goal with as little stress as possible on my system. I have a life time of practice in coping with the stress of life. So, I guess I better get a little more focused here on my educating process.
When details are complete I will post the link to the local newspapers, as well as the article. The woman I spoke with, (I don't want to use her name for privacy reasons) .... was very enthusiastic about the whole adventure, and Hillary as the driving force behind me in pushing me to go ahead with this. Risks vs. benefits .... there are risks to everything we do in life. To walk in my shoes for a few days these days would give just about anyone the hope I see in taking on this decision. I have lived WAY longer than most professionals ever gave me credit for, and I have done lots of things, good, and not-so-good decisions which I of course have paid for a time or two, but with no real regrets, as all of my encounters, happenings, joys, heartaches, etc. have all played a part in who I am and how I cope with what some have told me they could never handle. I believe we all have the capacity to effect another life, and with the faith in a God that is all mightier than we, most of us can acquire the personal, inner strength to overcome.
So ... with that being said .... things should start taking off pretty soon!! I am excited and so incredibly nervous as to how I will be received. If for nothing else, even if my transplant should not take (not a thought for me at this point), my venture will without a doubt help others to live longer, healthier, productive lives ..... and perhaps ..... maybe one step closer to a cure for this dreaded disease which continues to kill thousands every year.
On another note, I believe, the paper trail of requested information is in its last phase. I also spoke with the last doctor to send off information about my digestive complications today, and my last packet of documentation will go out Thursday. Now, if my new friend, Debbie, who is a joy to talk with on the phone, and is the transplant RN, has no further requests ..... it won't be long !!!! I am seeing at least a 20 pound weight loss in my near future .... who knows ... I may be hot again yet !!! ....LOL ..... not that the getting old thing has really bothered me :) ...as everything after 21 has pretty much been a gift !!!
Will update again in a day or two.
Thanks to all who have come forward to let their feelings be known, and their support shine, it is deeply felt and appreciated by my heart and soul!!
Enjoy your evening !!
et
Saturday, November 7, 2009
Symptoms
Morning ....
9:30 here in sunny Arizona and I am semi-stupid.
Twice on Thursday, once last night, and again this morning. I have been up since 4:!5, finished up some work (the payable sort), vacuumed, got some laundry going, just got out of the shower, took the dog out (again) the irritation is a symptom. One I don't particularly care for as it throws me all out of sort.
I am in process of taking care of the elevating of the BS as I sit here dazed and confused, with the imminent pounding headache that comes with it.
Symptoms of low blood sugar (hypoglycemia) are the things I now lack with 37 years under my belt.
Sweating; confusion; tremors/trembling (shakes); irritability; at the moment I am drawing a blank as to a few of the other one, but I will be putting some links off to the side that will inform you of the signs and symptoms of both hyper and hypoglycemia.
I don't get these signs of symptoms anymore until I have dropped to a critical point (I amaze myself that I can still stand never mind fumble my way to the kitchen at times). I become very disoriented, confused, repetitive, just down right stupid. Hillary has relayed episodes back to me where I remember very little if anything at all of the encounter, i.e., like the night I plowed into the office with a bowl of cereal and told her to google a Dunkin' Donut franchise .... she did thinking I was completely "with it" at the time, turned around to inform me and I was gone. Empty cereal bowl found on the counter, me out flat in bed, not really responsive, but on my way back up. It is like I have everything I have sucked out of me, and then there have been times when my whole day is shot, due to the fact it takes so much out of me to come back up in a normal range. Not to mention, the brain cells I lose on each of these episodes. A tidbit of information I learned the hard way right after giving birth to Hillary 21 years ago. I had been home from the hospital maybe a week, 2-3 times in that week I had landed in the ER due to seizure like drop out of BS. One episode in particular I do remember very vividly, as if not for my mother telling the EMTs I would be fine 'cause I flipped them off!! LOL ...... It was sort of like a stroke, I apparently fell off the couch while feeding the baby, next thing I remember, I was surrounded by EMTs, on the floor, wet, not being able to speak, not being able to move, it was what I relate to having a stroke, as I was frozen. In any event, upon arrival in the ER this lovely "little" man whom I had encountered already in this week informed me in a sort of snotty tone that "every time you do this, you are killing brain cells!" (Like I was freakin' doing it because it felt so good and I got so much out of it!!) What an ass!!! Now I know that there are stupid people in the world, always the ones that think "it will never happen to me" but I would like to think, that I am not one of them. I am compliant with my medications, and have been pretty good about dealing with the stressors of life that effect my health. But, let's be realistic here, I am going to tell you all right up front, I am not perfect .... LMAO ...... I don't always take things too seriously, as I have found that a blood sugar out of range is no real reason to freak out. I have found that what works best for me is to try and keep them within the ranges set forth for me by my doctors, in hopes of preventing these episodes. I must admit, it doesn't always work. I like to think I have a pretty good outlook on life, and that the saying "Don't sweat the small stuff" is true .... and much of the "big stuff" we have no control over anyway .... so might as well just ride it out and hope for the best.
I think I need to stop this ramble now as my fingers are getting that weird tingling feeling, (a clue I am on the rise), but am feeling the need to lay down for a bit while everyone is quiet and/or sleeping.
Thanks for tuning into this latest ramble.
Thanks to those couple of people who have commented on some of my posts, I appreciate the comments, makes me feel I am not always talking to myself !!! :D (which I do a lot of)
Have a wonderful day !!
et
9:30 here in sunny Arizona and I am semi-stupid.
Twice on Thursday, once last night, and again this morning. I have been up since 4:!5, finished up some work (the payable sort), vacuumed, got some laundry going, just got out of the shower, took the dog out (again) the irritation is a symptom. One I don't particularly care for as it throws me all out of sort.
I am in process of taking care of the elevating of the BS as I sit here dazed and confused, with the imminent pounding headache that comes with it.
Symptoms of low blood sugar (hypoglycemia) are the things I now lack with 37 years under my belt.
Sweating; confusion; tremors/trembling (shakes); irritability; at the moment I am drawing a blank as to a few of the other one, but I will be putting some links off to the side that will inform you of the signs and symptoms of both hyper and hypoglycemia.
I don't get these signs of symptoms anymore until I have dropped to a critical point (I amaze myself that I can still stand never mind fumble my way to the kitchen at times). I become very disoriented, confused, repetitive, just down right stupid. Hillary has relayed episodes back to me where I remember very little if anything at all of the encounter, i.e., like the night I plowed into the office with a bowl of cereal and told her to google a Dunkin' Donut franchise .... she did thinking I was completely "with it" at the time, turned around to inform me and I was gone. Empty cereal bowl found on the counter, me out flat in bed, not really responsive, but on my way back up. It is like I have everything I have sucked out of me, and then there have been times when my whole day is shot, due to the fact it takes so much out of me to come back up in a normal range. Not to mention, the brain cells I lose on each of these episodes. A tidbit of information I learned the hard way right after giving birth to Hillary 21 years ago. I had been home from the hospital maybe a week, 2-3 times in that week I had landed in the ER due to seizure like drop out of BS. One episode in particular I do remember very vividly, as if not for my mother telling the EMTs I would be fine 'cause I flipped them off!! LOL ...... It was sort of like a stroke, I apparently fell off the couch while feeding the baby, next thing I remember, I was surrounded by EMTs, on the floor, wet, not being able to speak, not being able to move, it was what I relate to having a stroke, as I was frozen. In any event, upon arrival in the ER this lovely "little" man whom I had encountered already in this week informed me in a sort of snotty tone that "every time you do this, you are killing brain cells!" (Like I was freakin' doing it because it felt so good and I got so much out of it!!) What an ass!!! Now I know that there are stupid people in the world, always the ones that think "it will never happen to me" but I would like to think, that I am not one of them. I am compliant with my medications, and have been pretty good about dealing with the stressors of life that effect my health. But, let's be realistic here, I am going to tell you all right up front, I am not perfect .... LMAO ...... I don't always take things too seriously, as I have found that a blood sugar out of range is no real reason to freak out. I have found that what works best for me is to try and keep them within the ranges set forth for me by my doctors, in hopes of preventing these episodes. I must admit, it doesn't always work. I like to think I have a pretty good outlook on life, and that the saying "Don't sweat the small stuff" is true .... and much of the "big stuff" we have no control over anyway .... so might as well just ride it out and hope for the best.
I think I need to stop this ramble now as my fingers are getting that weird tingling feeling, (a clue I am on the rise), but am feeling the need to lay down for a bit while everyone is quiet and/or sleeping.
Thanks for tuning into this latest ramble.
Thanks to those couple of people who have commented on some of my posts, I appreciate the comments, makes me feel I am not always talking to myself !!! :D (which I do a lot of)
Have a wonderful day !!
et
Friday, November 6, 2009
TGIF !!
Good evening !!
Well .... TGIF .... I have been home for about two hours and I am just finishing up a tape for the doctor I work from home for. I managed to choke down some dinner, played with Maggie, went outside for while .... and then ..... clean the rug !! This lovely pup of mine (Maggie can be seen in the photo off to the right) has an underwear fetish !! LOL ..... she is a wonderful dog, has never chewed the furniture, house trained really easily, etc., etc., but when it comes to underwear this dog doesn't just chew them .... she swallows them whole !!! I have no clue when she grabbed this pair, I am thinking yesterday morning while attempting to get my day going .... out of my room when she dashes in in the mornings as I get ready for work. I place them in a hamper (bucket) that is fairly high, but my little precious just walks right up and sticks her nose in .... so I am down yet another pair!! That is two in one week !!! In any event, she proceeded to throw them up after we got done playing tonight. Hmmmmm ...... at the rate she is going I may have to go for that commando look .... eeeewww.... not at my age !! I didn't think she had actually swallowed anything yesterday morning, as I had just taken away a sock, didn't think she had enough time to grab anything else.... and things seemed to be going through as normal .... she ate, like most labs do ..... a lot !! LMAO ...... she just blows me away sometimes .... and tonight Hillary kept saying "why is she so foamy" .... sort of frothing just before she blew the skivvies .... ;D ..... anyway ... she is laying quietly in her crate now. Too much excitement I guess. We will go lay and watch some television in a while. We try and "chill" for an hour or so at night, she likes to lay with me and she is so totally engrossed in the television that I get a bigger kick out of watching her than whatever might be on the TV.
No new news this week from the "Team" .... I am hoping that it will only be a few more weeks before I get that call to set up the initial meeting of the transplant team I have great hopes that 2010 holds a new outlook for my life and that I can look forward to living a little longer still, (I'm still waiting for my prince you know) I believe the uncertainty of my future is sort of wearing on my little one .... (almost 21 year old little one) .... we have discussed this and she assures me that she WANTS me to have this done, it is the uncertainty of what may or could potentially happen in the mean time. I, like I always have, told her .... some things in life are out of our control, and it has been best for me to just go about life as it comes. I refuse, to sit, and just wait to die. There are things to do, and I figure as long I am out and about doing them, then I am allowing the Gods to go about their business, if I fall into the big scheme of things, so be it. I can only control me, and even then, I really don't have a lot of control these days. Things happen for no apparent reason, usually at some of the most inopportune times. For instance, last night, Hillary left for work about 6:00 PM, I know I had dinner as she has dinner all made when I got home from work. I know I had plugged in for my dinner (insulin to be infused through my pump) for a period of one hour. (My digestive tract has suffered damage due to the disease known as "gastroparesis"). Somewhere .... not sure of what time it was, I am pretty sure I was already in bed, I felt weird, nauseated, so I got up and checked my finger, 42 is my last recollection (it is my realm that BS under 50 become potentially critical rather quickly). . I have no idea what I ate, or how much of anything I put in my mouth, and apparently went back to bed. Needless to say, when I got up this morning, I was over the top 400+ These are the episodes that set Hillary on edge as I am alone, what can the dog really do for me??? She is only 10 months old, and it takes a lot of money to train a dog to pick up on this sort of stuff. My last lab, Shadow, could always tell when my blood sugar had bottomed out and she would pace the perimeter of the bed, bouncing to make it move until I got so irritated I would get up and do something. I always thought that was a pretty neat trait for a dog that we rescued. She was always right by my side and slept my the side of my bed. Not in it, beside it. Perhaps it is a scent ?? Don't know, but pretty impressive just the same. Maggie still has some learning to do, and a little more time in the house with me before I trust her to sleep next to bed unsupervised .... (given the underwear thefts ;)~
Okay ... one more note tonight and that is Hillary was accepted into the nursing program yesterday, scoring up there on the point scale allowing her top pick at the day program. Not really positive about how the whole process works. All I know is that she was ecstatic when I got home, fearing she had been overlooked for not having enough points, or scoring well on her exam. I KNEW she was going to get it .... the child really needs to elevate her assurance in herself, she is an excellent student, and a very intelligent girl. Like all of us, some test anxiety, a question of second guessing. I know she has what it takes to be what ever she wants to be and do it to her expectations .... which are pretty high. I will say, she has a backup plan this time around in the event she was not accepted this time around. But, SHE WAS!!! So she will begin her nursing portion of the program in the Spring semester.
On that note, I would like to wish everyone a FANTASTIC weekend !!
et
Well .... TGIF .... I have been home for about two hours and I am just finishing up a tape for the doctor I work from home for. I managed to choke down some dinner, played with Maggie, went outside for while .... and then ..... clean the rug !! This lovely pup of mine (Maggie can be seen in the photo off to the right) has an underwear fetish !! LOL ..... she is a wonderful dog, has never chewed the furniture, house trained really easily, etc., etc., but when it comes to underwear this dog doesn't just chew them .... she swallows them whole !!! I have no clue when she grabbed this pair, I am thinking yesterday morning while attempting to get my day going .... out of my room when she dashes in in the mornings as I get ready for work. I place them in a hamper (bucket) that is fairly high, but my little precious just walks right up and sticks her nose in .... so I am down yet another pair!! That is two in one week !!! In any event, she proceeded to throw them up after we got done playing tonight. Hmmmmm ...... at the rate she is going I may have to go for that commando look .... eeeewww.... not at my age !! I didn't think she had actually swallowed anything yesterday morning, as I had just taken away a sock, didn't think she had enough time to grab anything else.... and things seemed to be going through as normal .... she ate, like most labs do ..... a lot !! LMAO ...... she just blows me away sometimes .... and tonight Hillary kept saying "why is she so foamy" .... sort of frothing just before she blew the skivvies .... ;D ..... anyway ... she is laying quietly in her crate now. Too much excitement I guess. We will go lay and watch some television in a while. We try and "chill" for an hour or so at night, she likes to lay with me and she is so totally engrossed in the television that I get a bigger kick out of watching her than whatever might be on the TV.
No new news this week from the "Team" .... I am hoping that it will only be a few more weeks before I get that call to set up the initial meeting of the transplant team I have great hopes that 2010 holds a new outlook for my life and that I can look forward to living a little longer still, (I'm still waiting for my prince you know) I believe the uncertainty of my future is sort of wearing on my little one .... (almost 21 year old little one) .... we have discussed this and she assures me that she WANTS me to have this done, it is the uncertainty of what may or could potentially happen in the mean time. I, like I always have, told her .... some things in life are out of our control, and it has been best for me to just go about life as it comes. I refuse, to sit, and just wait to die. There are things to do, and I figure as long I am out and about doing them, then I am allowing the Gods to go about their business, if I fall into the big scheme of things, so be it. I can only control me, and even then, I really don't have a lot of control these days. Things happen for no apparent reason, usually at some of the most inopportune times. For instance, last night, Hillary left for work about 6:00 PM, I know I had dinner as she has dinner all made when I got home from work. I know I had plugged in for my dinner (insulin to be infused through my pump) for a period of one hour. (My digestive tract has suffered damage due to the disease known as "gastroparesis"). Somewhere .... not sure of what time it was, I am pretty sure I was already in bed, I felt weird, nauseated, so I got up and checked my finger, 42 is my last recollection (it is my realm that BS under 50 become potentially critical rather quickly). . I have no idea what I ate, or how much of anything I put in my mouth, and apparently went back to bed. Needless to say, when I got up this morning, I was over the top 400+ These are the episodes that set Hillary on edge as I am alone, what can the dog really do for me??? She is only 10 months old, and it takes a lot of money to train a dog to pick up on this sort of stuff. My last lab, Shadow, could always tell when my blood sugar had bottomed out and she would pace the perimeter of the bed, bouncing to make it move until I got so irritated I would get up and do something. I always thought that was a pretty neat trait for a dog that we rescued. She was always right by my side and slept my the side of my bed. Not in it, beside it. Perhaps it is a scent ?? Don't know, but pretty impressive just the same. Maggie still has some learning to do, and a little more time in the house with me before I trust her to sleep next to bed unsupervised .... (given the underwear thefts ;)~
Okay ... one more note tonight and that is Hillary was accepted into the nursing program yesterday, scoring up there on the point scale allowing her top pick at the day program. Not really positive about how the whole process works. All I know is that she was ecstatic when I got home, fearing she had been overlooked for not having enough points, or scoring well on her exam. I KNEW she was going to get it .... the child really needs to elevate her assurance in herself, she is an excellent student, and a very intelligent girl. Like all of us, some test anxiety, a question of second guessing. I know she has what it takes to be what ever she wants to be and do it to her expectations .... which are pretty high. I will say, she has a backup plan this time around in the event she was not accepted this time around. But, SHE WAS!!! So she will begin her nursing portion of the program in the Spring semester.
On that note, I would like to wish everyone a FANTASTIC weekend !!
et
Wednesday, November 4, 2009
FINALLY !!!
Hi everyone !!
Sorry for the delay in posts, my Internet was out for about a week.
On a good note, I passed my medical coding exam ..... FINALLY! I have been studying for this exam for a little over a year. My first attempt was 3 days after mom passed away ... let's just say, I wasn't all that focused on an exam where you had to sit for 4 1/2 hours and color in bubbles. In any event, took the test again Monday evening down in Phoenix through AHIMA, and did quite well if I do say so myself. I do believe that raise in the works now. So I am very pleased with that accomplishment. My next phase of the job will be to work for a couple of years under my new title "Certified Coding Assistant" and then I can test for the Certified Coding Specialist. That is going to require ongoing education and continued learning. I am also looking into going back to school (after seeing how the transplant pans out) to acquire my BA in Health Information Management with a background in IT. That was one area of my exam that I passed with a 100%!! Having been part of the so-called implementation team that got our new system up and running with employees at the clinic, I really enjoyed this aspect of the work. I was truly touched by all the emails that were in my box this morning when I got to the office congratulating me on my accomplishment, from the CEO, Doctor, therapist, and almost everyone from all aspects of the clinic, even a few people I have never met or encountered. A good feeling all around. So now I have to master my craft.
Okay ... enough about work.
The date for the yard sale is set for December 12th on the clinic grounds in Prescott AZ. A storage unit was donated with Hilly's salesmanship, and multiple cans are going in to a few of the local businesses. The girls at work have had a container on the counter for a couple of weeks. We are still waiting on the newspaper and hope to get an article published in the very near future advertising for the yard sale as well as educating the public. I enclosed the letter that was written by Hillary, with a little help from my friend/boss T., to use as a proposal letter in efforts to raise awareness and help with the fundraising process. She is a really incredible soul and a remarkable woman!! Hillary has been working hard in her efforts as well as working and going to school. She will conclude this semester in about another 6-8 weeks, beginning the nursing program in January. She has been a true support and totally encouraging of this transplant journey. A remarkable young woman, destined to make her mark on the world as well.
I have some work to wipe out here tonight, so I should really get cracking as I could so go to bed right now. A huge relief has been lifted with the passing of my exam, which has really dumped on the fatigue. I think I have been on auto-pilot for many months. One hurdle down, who knows how many more to go ... seems to be a never ending task in my life.....LOL .... so I need ALL the beauty sleep I can grab!!
THE LETTER:
DO YOU KNOW A STEEL MAGNOLIA? WELL I HAVE AN IRON MAGNOLIA, PLEASE READ, LISTEN AND HELP IF YOU CAN………
My name is Hillary Tyler, I am the daughter of Eliza Tyler, who has been a type 1, insulin dependent diabetic for over 37 years (Doctors see this as a miracle). Over the last several years, my mother’s awareness of her blood sugars has become severely diminished due to her condition. To the point, of being scary, she no longer can tell when her sugars are getting low. She has ended up in the intensive care unit, and now is a persistent challenge. It takes continuous monitoring of me and friends to make her aware of her blood sugar. If we are not relentless in our efforts to come to her rescue, especially when her blood sugar levels are severely compromised, (the scary part) she reaches a point where she is no longer able to function safely. Remember Julia Roberts in the Beauty Shop? Think about if that was your Mother, Sister, or Friend.
Recently however, she became aware of a clincal transplant trial that could potentially lessen the frequency of these episodes and perhaps even eliminate them (our ultimate goal!!!) She is eligible for an Islet Cell Transplant, which is a cutting edge technology to hopefully change the future for type one diabetics. In the process of this Islet Cell Transplant, the doctors will use an intense drug therapy of steroids to kill off her body’s immune system before transplanting the donor cells into the portal vein of her liver. They will then transplant donor islet cells into her body up to three times, if the first time is not effective. This is a long process, approximately 18 months, and she will have to be monitored closely by the doctors of the Islet Cell Transplant in San Francisco…….pre-transplant, during the transplant and post-transplant. She must return to the hospital for follow up visits once a week for at least the first month after the procedure, and several more times over the year following to monitor the results of the transplant.
Through this process, all medical expenses are paid (thank God for research dollars!!), but transportation, food and lodging are not, therefore, while the transplant is a great and wonderful and life saving procedure, the dollars only go so far. My Mother and I can not afford the many road trips to San Francisco, let alone the days of stay she will need covered during these procedures and follow-up. From our house to the Islet Cell Transplant facility it is 11 hours and 22 minutes driving, 749 miles, cost of gas one way approximately $113.00. Average cost of one day stay in a decent hotel, $150.00. So, just for one trip to San Francisco is approximately $1000, and she has many trips required for this transplant to work effectively and appropriately to save her life! As family and friends of my Mother, we are working to develop several community fundraising activities, both to help pay the way, and to spread community awareness of this breakthrough technology (Islet Cell Transplant) for the many type 1 diabetics. It would be greatly appreciated if we had your support in this journey of hope, whether it is funds, services or perhaps use of facilities in our attempts to support my amazing Mother through her exciting life changing and life saving voyage.
Please find it in your heart to help my Iron Magnolia, My Mother!
Thank you so much for your time and support.
Sorry for the delay in posts, my Internet was out for about a week.
On a good note, I passed my medical coding exam ..... FINALLY! I have been studying for this exam for a little over a year. My first attempt was 3 days after mom passed away ... let's just say, I wasn't all that focused on an exam where you had to sit for 4 1/2 hours and color in bubbles. In any event, took the test again Monday evening down in Phoenix through AHIMA, and did quite well if I do say so myself. I do believe that raise in the works now. So I am very pleased with that accomplishment. My next phase of the job will be to work for a couple of years under my new title "Certified Coding Assistant" and then I can test for the Certified Coding Specialist. That is going to require ongoing education and continued learning. I am also looking into going back to school (after seeing how the transplant pans out) to acquire my BA in Health Information Management with a background in IT. That was one area of my exam that I passed with a 100%!! Having been part of the so-called implementation team that got our new system up and running with employees at the clinic, I really enjoyed this aspect of the work. I was truly touched by all the emails that were in my box this morning when I got to the office congratulating me on my accomplishment, from the CEO, Doctor, therapist, and almost everyone from all aspects of the clinic, even a few people I have never met or encountered. A good feeling all around. So now I have to master my craft.
Okay ... enough about work.
The date for the yard sale is set for December 12th on the clinic grounds in Prescott AZ. A storage unit was donated with Hilly's salesmanship, and multiple cans are going in to a few of the local businesses. The girls at work have had a container on the counter for a couple of weeks. We are still waiting on the newspaper and hope to get an article published in the very near future advertising for the yard sale as well as educating the public. I enclosed the letter that was written by Hillary, with a little help from my friend/boss T., to use as a proposal letter in efforts to raise awareness and help with the fundraising process. She is a really incredible soul and a remarkable woman!! Hillary has been working hard in her efforts as well as working and going to school. She will conclude this semester in about another 6-8 weeks, beginning the nursing program in January. She has been a true support and totally encouraging of this transplant journey. A remarkable young woman, destined to make her mark on the world as well.
I have some work to wipe out here tonight, so I should really get cracking as I could so go to bed right now. A huge relief has been lifted with the passing of my exam, which has really dumped on the fatigue. I think I have been on auto-pilot for many months. One hurdle down, who knows how many more to go ... seems to be a never ending task in my life.....LOL .... so I need ALL the beauty sleep I can grab!!
THE LETTER:
DO YOU KNOW A STEEL MAGNOLIA? WELL I HAVE AN IRON MAGNOLIA, PLEASE READ, LISTEN AND HELP IF YOU CAN………
My name is Hillary Tyler, I am the daughter of Eliza Tyler, who has been a type 1, insulin dependent diabetic for over 37 years (Doctors see this as a miracle). Over the last several years, my mother’s awareness of her blood sugars has become severely diminished due to her condition. To the point, of being scary, she no longer can tell when her sugars are getting low. She has ended up in the intensive care unit, and now is a persistent challenge. It takes continuous monitoring of me and friends to make her aware of her blood sugar. If we are not relentless in our efforts to come to her rescue, especially when her blood sugar levels are severely compromised, (the scary part) she reaches a point where she is no longer able to function safely. Remember Julia Roberts in the Beauty Shop? Think about if that was your Mother, Sister, or Friend.
Recently however, she became aware of a clincal transplant trial that could potentially lessen the frequency of these episodes and perhaps even eliminate them (our ultimate goal!!!) She is eligible for an Islet Cell Transplant, which is a cutting edge technology to hopefully change the future for type one diabetics. In the process of this Islet Cell Transplant, the doctors will use an intense drug therapy of steroids to kill off her body’s immune system before transplanting the donor cells into the portal vein of her liver. They will then transplant donor islet cells into her body up to three times, if the first time is not effective. This is a long process, approximately 18 months, and she will have to be monitored closely by the doctors of the Islet Cell Transplant in San Francisco…….pre-transplant, during the transplant and post-transplant. She must return to the hospital for follow up visits once a week for at least the first month after the procedure, and several more times over the year following to monitor the results of the transplant.
Through this process, all medical expenses are paid (thank God for research dollars!!), but transportation, food and lodging are not, therefore, while the transplant is a great and wonderful and life saving procedure, the dollars only go so far. My Mother and I can not afford the many road trips to San Francisco, let alone the days of stay she will need covered during these procedures and follow-up. From our house to the Islet Cell Transplant facility it is 11 hours and 22 minutes driving, 749 miles, cost of gas one way approximately $113.00. Average cost of one day stay in a decent hotel, $150.00. So, just for one trip to San Francisco is approximately $1000, and she has many trips required for this transplant to work effectively and appropriately to save her life! As family and friends of my Mother, we are working to develop several community fundraising activities, both to help pay the way, and to spread community awareness of this breakthrough technology (Islet Cell Transplant) for the many type 1 diabetics. It would be greatly appreciated if we had your support in this journey of hope, whether it is funds, services or perhaps use of facilities in our attempts to support my amazing Mother through her exciting life changing and life saving voyage.
Please find it in your heart to help my Iron Magnolia, My Mother!
Thank you so much for your time and support.
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