Hello Everyone!!
It is 4:40 PM here in AZ and I have to say, I haven't done a thing all day except sleep. I can't believe one body can be so worn out that it just needs nothing more than some hydration and sleep. I do feel a little better due to in part being able to sleep in my own bed with no interuptions. My gut is back on the mend. It was an issue as of yesterday that may have held a delay in my discharge due to no movement for a week. The prednisone is on the taper down and off over the next 10 days. So .. I guess for the next week I am to go easy, like I can get much easier than all this sleep. I am doing my very best to regain my strength and vitality.
For tonight, Hillary will be going off to work soon and Maggie and I are going to hunker down and watch the Oscars ... LOL .... not real brain matter required here..LOL... so ... I wish everyone a wonderful, relaxing evening and a super week ahead.
I will try and regroup on the stemmie front as I try and determine what, if any hangup there may have been during this past week of total invasion of infection with bilateral pneumonia. So far, the only real hold up I have noticed is the gut motility, which I attribute to all the antibiotics and narcotics that were administerd.
Be well my friends!!
Peace and Light
et
Bumped from the trial process here in the US, I chose to undergo adult stem cell therapy. In my continued research I believe that stem cells are really where the "cures" for many debilitating diseases lie. Follow me ... and hope that we do great things together.
Sunday, February 27, 2011
Saturday, February 26, 2011
I'm home
Just to let you all know that I am home as of 1:30 this afternoon. I am exhausted and looking forward to sleeping in my own bed. Maggie is thrilled to have me home and she is crashed out on me currently.
I will try and make an update of whats been happening, but for now, I have been reoouping from bilateral pneumonia in which was originally thought to be a blood clot due to all the extended travel I did in a short period of time. So, since Monday I have been pumped full of 3 different antibiotics to include Vancomyacin, the big gun. All were discontinued late last night with the exception of the IV steroid in which was stopped this morning, and the only prescription I was sent home with. A 10 taper off the steroids. I was a little grossed out with the removal of the pic line, when the nurse said, just take a deep breath and this is going to feel like a "giant worm being pulled from your skin." EEEEWWWWW..... it wasn't that bad, but it is sore now after my shower.
Ok .. well .. it is snowing out, so we are going to bed, to be snowbound in house tomorrow.... and I am so looking forward to it!!
Good night my friends!!!
Sleep well ... Peace and Light
eliza
I will try and make an update of whats been happening, but for now, I have been reoouping from bilateral pneumonia in which was originally thought to be a blood clot due to all the extended travel I did in a short period of time. So, since Monday I have been pumped full of 3 different antibiotics to include Vancomyacin, the big gun. All were discontinued late last night with the exception of the IV steroid in which was stopped this morning, and the only prescription I was sent home with. A 10 taper off the steroids. I was a little grossed out with the removal of the pic line, when the nurse said, just take a deep breath and this is going to feel like a "giant worm being pulled from your skin." EEEEWWWWW..... it wasn't that bad, but it is sore now after my shower.
Ok .. well .. it is snowing out, so we are going to bed, to be snowbound in house tomorrow.... and I am so looking forward to it!!
Good night my friends!!!
Sleep well ... Peace and Light
eliza
Friday, February 25, 2011
At least one more night at the "Inn"
Afternoon all!!!
Well, I apparently look "very tired" ... can't imagine why.
Doc came in this morning and we reviewed findings and status. I will apparently be doing at the least, one more night here at the inn. Tomorrow they will wean me off the IV antibiotics and steroids to place me on oral versions. Once the taper occurs we will assess to see if perhaps I can go home. If I am discharged home I will be there for another week on oral meds and seen to determine when I can return to work. I dread to think of what will be piled up there..... grrrrr ..... For now, I am very tired and awaiting the respiratory therapist for another breathing treatment and then perhaps a long nap .... nights don't seem to be condusive around here for any real rest. My nurse is very good, attentive, etc today, but the aide, is irritating us both. I walked myself due to getting sick of waiting on her since this morning. All she has done for me today is tape up my pic line so I could take a shower, she has been on a breakfast, lunch and other break ever since. My face is all hot and flushed ... so I am waiting on the RT to scan those results as I am still on room air, and thinking maybe the O2 needs to go back on.
Nothing yet from the stem cell people, but I believe that they are still hard at work, just not sure where??? I continue to see results in my skin, overall pain in my joints, etc.
So .. thanks to EVERYONE who continues to send all the great vibes and love, they are so felt and much appreciated. The long distance phone call I got last night was wonderful, and thanks for thinking of me .... Will post again soon with any update on status.
Have a happy, wonderful, relaxing weekend!!!
Peace and Light
et
Well, I apparently look "very tired" ... can't imagine why.
Doc came in this morning and we reviewed findings and status. I will apparently be doing at the least, one more night here at the inn. Tomorrow they will wean me off the IV antibiotics and steroids to place me on oral versions. Once the taper occurs we will assess to see if perhaps I can go home. If I am discharged home I will be there for another week on oral meds and seen to determine when I can return to work. I dread to think of what will be piled up there..... grrrrr ..... For now, I am very tired and awaiting the respiratory therapist for another breathing treatment and then perhaps a long nap .... nights don't seem to be condusive around here for any real rest. My nurse is very good, attentive, etc today, but the aide, is irritating us both. I walked myself due to getting sick of waiting on her since this morning. All she has done for me today is tape up my pic line so I could take a shower, she has been on a breakfast, lunch and other break ever since. My face is all hot and flushed ... so I am waiting on the RT to scan those results as I am still on room air, and thinking maybe the O2 needs to go back on.
Nothing yet from the stem cell people, but I believe that they are still hard at work, just not sure where??? I continue to see results in my skin, overall pain in my joints, etc.
So .. thanks to EVERYONE who continues to send all the great vibes and love, they are so felt and much appreciated. The long distance phone call I got last night was wonderful, and thanks for thinking of me .... Will post again soon with any update on status.
Have a happy, wonderful, relaxing weekend!!!
Peace and Light
et
Thursday, February 24, 2011
Just a quickie
Evening 'all !!
Just a quickie before I settle in and TRY and get a decent nights sleep .... right. Been told someone will be in at 8, 9 and 10, oh, and again at 3!! I am awaiting on results from todays chest X-ray, which will most likely be reviewed by the doctor in the morning prior to coming in to see me. I would really like to go home and try out my sea legs....LOL .... ya, I know, I am to rest, but I can at least attempt to do a few things (keeping them on a very small scale) to get the house back in order. This really has been a downfall, not planned, thought I was getting over it, etc. Now they are saying if I should "significant improvement" tomorrow they may think of sending me home with rest at home for the next week. Now I am going to have renew all my PTO time so that maybe in a few months I can take an actual vacation and do something other than a medical procedure and/or a treatment of some sort that keeps me down and out for a week or two.
So ... I hope to have a better night tonight and will dream of sleeping in my own bed real soon, maybe tomorrow night or Saturday. In the meantime, I have to play nice in the sandbox with others, and they have all been really wonderful in the care of me. Shift change ... sleep well everyone and we will talk again soon.
Peace and Light
et
Just a quickie before I settle in and TRY and get a decent nights sleep .... right. Been told someone will be in at 8, 9 and 10, oh, and again at 3!! I am awaiting on results from todays chest X-ray, which will most likely be reviewed by the doctor in the morning prior to coming in to see me. I would really like to go home and try out my sea legs....LOL .... ya, I know, I am to rest, but I can at least attempt to do a few things (keeping them on a very small scale) to get the house back in order. This really has been a downfall, not planned, thought I was getting over it, etc. Now they are saying if I should "significant improvement" tomorrow they may think of sending me home with rest at home for the next week. Now I am going to have renew all my PTO time so that maybe in a few months I can take an actual vacation and do something other than a medical procedure and/or a treatment of some sort that keeps me down and out for a week or two.
So ... I hope to have a better night tonight and will dream of sleeping in my own bed real soon, maybe tomorrow night or Saturday. In the meantime, I have to play nice in the sandbox with others, and they have all been really wonderful in the care of me. Shift change ... sleep well everyone and we will talk again soon.
Peace and Light
et
On that one week mark ...
Hi Everyone!!!
Well, after my last post on Monday I had a major set back. As you are all aware, I have been fighting an upper respiratory infection, which started as a sinus infection beginning back in late November, and moved into my chest. As the norm where I am concerned I pushed myself. I did stay home the week between Christmas and New Years to treat and rest and went back to work. Then push some more, all the while taking antibiotics and treating with my supplements and mucinex, etc. Well .. as I had stated the cough became more aggressive upon leaving the operating room in Mexico. The Doctor in Mexico treated me while there with 2 breathing treatments and something to calm the cough. Ok ... fast forward to the week after I had returned home. I was trying to clean up after the dog on Monday and just couldn't do it. Breathing had become such an effort that to walk the 4 feet from my bed to the master bath was next to impossible. I continued to try the clean up when the phone rang. It was my PCP's office calling on a referral that I needed for insurance purposes in regard to having my endocrinologist in Phoenix covered. She noticed I was having a very difficult time breathing and thought I should be seen, so the trail began. I was asked to come to the office at 3 PM, which I did with Hillary doing the driving as the coughing was uncontrollable and I was told my head was purple from the straining of such a dry, unproductive cough. From the office, doc sent us to the ER. Once I arrived in the ER it was like lightening speed that I was taken back and the games began.
Since Monday afternoon, in that first 24 hours I had been pumped with 3 different IV antibiotics, blood cultures were drawn, a CT was done and it was determined that I was suffering from bilateral pneumonia!!!! I was floored ... with all the antibiotics I had been on since Christmas there shouldn't have been anything growing on me, in me, or within a 12 foot radius!!! I was admitted, and am still here for at least another day, with another week at home after discharge.
The heavy duty antibiotic (Vancomyacin) was discontinued this morning and replaced with steroids (prednisone compound). I will remain on the other two antibiotics for now as the steroid builds up and then is tapered back. I hate steroids as they really do a job on your blood sugars, making control even tougher. I can honestly say that so far, this round is starting of smoothly, and I know how to treat for it, it is just a major hassle. My nurses are wonderful and of course, I am pushing my stemmie treatment..... LOL .... They have had me on morphine and a prophenazine/codeine cough syrup which is helping to loosen up some, but VERY litte movement happening as of yet. I have a call into the Stem Cell Institute to see if there might be any adverse effects from all this antibiotic treatment. They have also placed me on Lovenox shots to prevent me throwing a blood clot. Which was what they initially thought this was due to my recent whirlwind travel, the surgical procedure, and the amount of rest I had been demanding .... lol ... prevention is good.
Ok ... well .... In about 45 minutes they will be coming in to do yet another breathing treatment (every 4 hours), then it will be cough/codeine, and tonight they will run the antibiotics. I am so glad they inserted this PIC line yesterday or I really would be an unhappy camper at best. The whole scenario just sucks. I can't even imagine what this little stay is going to cost, all I can say is ... well, I just met my deductible ... LOL ... so the rest of the year should be gravy.
My labs have been showing weird little changes, elevated white count is down, (so there was/is infection somewhere), potassium and magnesium are off, I have lost 8 pounds in only a week. Just weird stuff ... they did a chest X-ray today at lunch time in which we are awaiting results to see where we stand at this point. I just don't understand how this all came to such a drastic conclusion?????
My dog is depressed, my daughter is exhausted, and my father still thinks the world revolves around him as all he could say when Hillary let him know what was going on was "I need milk and donuts" and "You better pay my electric bill before they shut me off!!" I just live for self-centered people who can't see past their own nose. He apparently has a wallet full of cash and yet expects us to do all this excess running around in our vehicles to make special trips for him @ $3.20 a gallon. Sorry ... at this point, your bad if you can't let someone know PRIOR to running out of something. You know that saying, "An emergency on your part does not constitute an emergency on mine."
Ok kids .... sorry I don't have better news. My wrinkles continue to dissolve ... hehehe .... and my feet, stomach, and blood sugars remain stable in spite of the current situation. I will post again in a day or 2 to see if there will be any adverse effects from the treatment in regard to the stem cells. GOD, I certainly hope not!!! ... and ... I continue to spread the word and education on Stem Cell treatment and all the potential it carries.
I feel that in the past three weeks that God has placed people in my path, some old friends, some new ones, and each one placed for a reason, and each one a blessing from above. I am learning more and more about so many things, including myself and for me, that is always a plus. A plus in the sense that I am here, I have been placed, yet again, in a difficult situation, and must plow through with as much dignity, compassion, and angry hair as possible. LOL ....Just a couple of hours ago, after a REALLY bad night, I was given both the morphine and the codeine cocktail at the same time, made me fuzzy, warm, and so ready to sleep, so I did .... apparently so hard, for four hours, that when my nurse came in she said she had to come in and gage my breathing, was I breathing, how fast, etc. She said I was out so hard she just couldn't wake me up knowing what kind of night it was. She said "oh your were just so cute, and peacefully sleeping" ... I responded with "ya, I'm sure, like a dead dog on the porch steps, right?" .... LMAO .... in any event, I just had more morphine, and the rest is on its way, another breathing treatment, and Hillary will be here to take me for a supervised walk around the halls.
I would like to go home ... but I really think maybe it is best to stay on like suggested as I can't afford relapse on this "crud" which seems to be going around everywhere.
To ease some people's minds, I did not catch this while in Mexico, I had this prior to treatment, and was unaware of just how serious it was, or could become.
I hope everyone following is well and healthy, mind and body!!!
Talk soon,
Peace and Light
et
Well, after my last post on Monday I had a major set back. As you are all aware, I have been fighting an upper respiratory infection, which started as a sinus infection beginning back in late November, and moved into my chest. As the norm where I am concerned I pushed myself. I did stay home the week between Christmas and New Years to treat and rest and went back to work. Then push some more, all the while taking antibiotics and treating with my supplements and mucinex, etc. Well .. as I had stated the cough became more aggressive upon leaving the operating room in Mexico. The Doctor in Mexico treated me while there with 2 breathing treatments and something to calm the cough. Ok ... fast forward to the week after I had returned home. I was trying to clean up after the dog on Monday and just couldn't do it. Breathing had become such an effort that to walk the 4 feet from my bed to the master bath was next to impossible. I continued to try the clean up when the phone rang. It was my PCP's office calling on a referral that I needed for insurance purposes in regard to having my endocrinologist in Phoenix covered. She noticed I was having a very difficult time breathing and thought I should be seen, so the trail began. I was asked to come to the office at 3 PM, which I did with Hillary doing the driving as the coughing was uncontrollable and I was told my head was purple from the straining of such a dry, unproductive cough. From the office, doc sent us to the ER. Once I arrived in the ER it was like lightening speed that I was taken back and the games began.
Since Monday afternoon, in that first 24 hours I had been pumped with 3 different IV antibiotics, blood cultures were drawn, a CT was done and it was determined that I was suffering from bilateral pneumonia!!!! I was floored ... with all the antibiotics I had been on since Christmas there shouldn't have been anything growing on me, in me, or within a 12 foot radius!!! I was admitted, and am still here for at least another day, with another week at home after discharge.
The heavy duty antibiotic (Vancomyacin) was discontinued this morning and replaced with steroids (prednisone compound). I will remain on the other two antibiotics for now as the steroid builds up and then is tapered back. I hate steroids as they really do a job on your blood sugars, making control even tougher. I can honestly say that so far, this round is starting of smoothly, and I know how to treat for it, it is just a major hassle. My nurses are wonderful and of course, I am pushing my stemmie treatment..... LOL .... They have had me on morphine and a prophenazine/codeine cough syrup which is helping to loosen up some, but VERY litte movement happening as of yet. I have a call into the Stem Cell Institute to see if there might be any adverse effects from all this antibiotic treatment. They have also placed me on Lovenox shots to prevent me throwing a blood clot. Which was what they initially thought this was due to my recent whirlwind travel, the surgical procedure, and the amount of rest I had been demanding .... lol ... prevention is good.
Ok ... well .... In about 45 minutes they will be coming in to do yet another breathing treatment (every 4 hours), then it will be cough/codeine, and tonight they will run the antibiotics. I am so glad they inserted this PIC line yesterday or I really would be an unhappy camper at best. The whole scenario just sucks. I can't even imagine what this little stay is going to cost, all I can say is ... well, I just met my deductible ... LOL ... so the rest of the year should be gravy.
My labs have been showing weird little changes, elevated white count is down, (so there was/is infection somewhere), potassium and magnesium are off, I have lost 8 pounds in only a week. Just weird stuff ... they did a chest X-ray today at lunch time in which we are awaiting results to see where we stand at this point. I just don't understand how this all came to such a drastic conclusion?????
My dog is depressed, my daughter is exhausted, and my father still thinks the world revolves around him as all he could say when Hillary let him know what was going on was "I need milk and donuts" and "You better pay my electric bill before they shut me off!!" I just live for self-centered people who can't see past their own nose. He apparently has a wallet full of cash and yet expects us to do all this excess running around in our vehicles to make special trips for him @ $3.20 a gallon. Sorry ... at this point, your bad if you can't let someone know PRIOR to running out of something. You know that saying, "An emergency on your part does not constitute an emergency on mine."
Ok kids .... sorry I don't have better news. My wrinkles continue to dissolve ... hehehe .... and my feet, stomach, and blood sugars remain stable in spite of the current situation. I will post again in a day or 2 to see if there will be any adverse effects from the treatment in regard to the stem cells. GOD, I certainly hope not!!! ... and ... I continue to spread the word and education on Stem Cell treatment and all the potential it carries.
I feel that in the past three weeks that God has placed people in my path, some old friends, some new ones, and each one placed for a reason, and each one a blessing from above. I am learning more and more about so many things, including myself and for me, that is always a plus. A plus in the sense that I am here, I have been placed, yet again, in a difficult situation, and must plow through with as much dignity, compassion, and angry hair as possible. LOL ....Just a couple of hours ago, after a REALLY bad night, I was given both the morphine and the codeine cocktail at the same time, made me fuzzy, warm, and so ready to sleep, so I did .... apparently so hard, for four hours, that when my nurse came in she said she had to come in and gage my breathing, was I breathing, how fast, etc. She said I was out so hard she just couldn't wake me up knowing what kind of night it was. She said "oh your were just so cute, and peacefully sleeping" ... I responded with "ya, I'm sure, like a dead dog on the porch steps, right?" .... LMAO .... in any event, I just had more morphine, and the rest is on its way, another breathing treatment, and Hillary will be here to take me for a supervised walk around the halls.
I would like to go home ... but I really think maybe it is best to stay on like suggested as I can't afford relapse on this "crud" which seems to be going around everywhere.
To ease some people's minds, I did not catch this while in Mexico, I had this prior to treatment, and was unaware of just how serious it was, or could become.
I hope everyone following is well and healthy, mind and body!!!
Talk soon,
Peace and Light
et
Monday, February 21, 2011
One week at home
Happy Presidents Day !!! (at least for those who have the day off)
I have been home (in my own bed) for one week now and I have to say, all is very promising, except for the lack of real breathing!! I am not sure how much more of this repair I can tolerate. For the most part, congestion is clearing, hard and heavy. I am, however, totally winded in any effort to be physical, like walk across the house, fold laundry, empty dishwasher, sweep floor ... I think you get the picture. It would seem that 9 out of 10 people I have encountered since being home has this "crud" as they are calling it, and everyone is down, and down hard. I want to just let it ride, rest, hydrate, etc., but I have things I want to get going on.
My blood sugars continue to remain stable. This has to be the most positive change for me thus far in that I have had only 3 lows, and all of them came with a warning!!! Slight as it may be currently, I anticipate in getting better with time. Insulin intake is down to 15 units per day (basal rate), and my carb to insulin ration has gone from 1/15 to 1/20 .... all positive happenings. My eye sight is clearer than it has been in years .... even without my glasses. Brain fog totally clear, that is a huge relief for both me and Hilly as I was losing my grip in not being able to remember much of what happened in a day, and losing time with every low that came crashing down. It is just amazing how what seems simple to most can reek such havok on one's life.
I have had some very promising and enlightening communications from people throughout the world recently ... and, a couple of people who have also undergone some sort of therapy in this realm, and I must say, I think the Gods have been in my corner. I can't say enough about the treatment I underwent, the care I received, and all the tiny arrangements made by the International Stem Cell Institute and thier affliates. WONDERFUL!!! AMAZING!!! PROMISING!!! I want to continue my research and look forward to sharing my data on changes and progress with not only the ISCI but perhaps the biotech company also doing clinical trials on Type I diabetes and the adipose treatment of such.
Hoping that everyone following me on this incredible journey to post questions, comments, info that may be informative to others, acceptance of the science in the world of medicine, and to get the political hands out of our soup!!! .... LOL ...
Ok ... well ... for today, I am going to attempt to do some "small" household chores ... but already see a nap coming on fast. I am fine while laying down resting, but as soon as I move to get up, walk, etc., the hacking, asthmatic like cough comes on strong and hard, like a flipping workout, which I am not yet physically up to. I am hoping this sort of energy comes about soon as I still have much yard work to get on, especially with spring coming. Luckily, weather shows not so great outdoor weather for at least the next week. :D
I wish everyone a wonderful day, and a productive week.
In good health ... Peace and Light
et
I have been home (in my own bed) for one week now and I have to say, all is very promising, except for the lack of real breathing!! I am not sure how much more of this repair I can tolerate. For the most part, congestion is clearing, hard and heavy. I am, however, totally winded in any effort to be physical, like walk across the house, fold laundry, empty dishwasher, sweep floor ... I think you get the picture. It would seem that 9 out of 10 people I have encountered since being home has this "crud" as they are calling it, and everyone is down, and down hard. I want to just let it ride, rest, hydrate, etc., but I have things I want to get going on.
My blood sugars continue to remain stable. This has to be the most positive change for me thus far in that I have had only 3 lows, and all of them came with a warning!!! Slight as it may be currently, I anticipate in getting better with time. Insulin intake is down to 15 units per day (basal rate), and my carb to insulin ration has gone from 1/15 to 1/20 .... all positive happenings. My eye sight is clearer than it has been in years .... even without my glasses. Brain fog totally clear, that is a huge relief for both me and Hilly as I was losing my grip in not being able to remember much of what happened in a day, and losing time with every low that came crashing down. It is just amazing how what seems simple to most can reek such havok on one's life.
I have had some very promising and enlightening communications from people throughout the world recently ... and, a couple of people who have also undergone some sort of therapy in this realm, and I must say, I think the Gods have been in my corner. I can't say enough about the treatment I underwent, the care I received, and all the tiny arrangements made by the International Stem Cell Institute and thier affliates. WONDERFUL!!! AMAZING!!! PROMISING!!! I want to continue my research and look forward to sharing my data on changes and progress with not only the ISCI but perhaps the biotech company also doing clinical trials on Type I diabetes and the adipose treatment of such.
Hoping that everyone following me on this incredible journey to post questions, comments, info that may be informative to others, acceptance of the science in the world of medicine, and to get the political hands out of our soup!!! .... LOL ...
Ok ... well ... for today, I am going to attempt to do some "small" household chores ... but already see a nap coming on fast. I am fine while laying down resting, but as soon as I move to get up, walk, etc., the hacking, asthmatic like cough comes on strong and hard, like a flipping workout, which I am not yet physically up to. I am hoping this sort of energy comes about soon as I still have much yard work to get on, especially with spring coming. Luckily, weather shows not so great outdoor weather for at least the next week. :D
I wish everyone a wonderful day, and a productive week.
In good health ... Peace and Light
et
Friday, February 18, 2011
More Changes
Hi,
Thank God it's Friday ... and I only put in two days at work, and not even full days. I had no idea how hard these "little guys" would have to work, or that they would run a marathon to help fix 38 years of use and abuse. My lungs are hopefully on the mend as I am not sure how much more of this congestion/cough I can handle.
On another note, some changes that continue as the days go by. The bruise on my belly from the liposuction is completely gone!!! That in itself is pretty amazing stuff given I bruise easily and it usually takes a good two weeks for color to disappear. Two, my feet!! Absolutely incredible!! The bottoms of my feet are almost as smooth as a baby's butt!! I have been trying for several years to stay on top of my feet, calluses, dry skin from lack of circulation, etc. Spa treatments, heavy based creams to keep moisture in only work for a few hours, and in just one week, the bottoms of my feet look better than they have in years with just basic attention. Third, my continued stable blood sugars and decreased bolus to carb ratios is impressive, as well as the time it is taking to digest things. All this is huge, an indescribable feeling, and an ease in which I have not had in some time, well .... to be brutally honest, in the time it took me to get a grip on life, it was too late to fix some of the damage that had already been done. On top of those little tidbits, last night I was awoken by Maggie about 1:00AM, when she woke me I did feel a little on the warm side so we got up and went to the kitchen where my blood sugar read 68, not too bad given my track record, I proceeded to pour an 8 oz glass of juice and waited 30 minutes. Well .... if I had the lung capacity right now to cartwheel, I would!!! It only took 30 minutes to raise to 110!! and I didn't bolus anything to cover that juice and went back to bed, to awake to 168!! Not to shabby!!!
All these little changes are HUGE!!! I can't wait to see what is going to take place in the next 6-8 weeks when I was told my skin would undergo remarkable change being the largest organ in the body. I already see a difference in my skin tone and texture, especially those wrinkles which seemed to have deep seeded roots on the left side of my face!! All improving, and I can't help but feel that all the water (more then my normal 3-4 bottles a day) is helping in this process. I was ordered to have lab work done again in a couple of weeks, I can't wait to see what sort of results show up there, if any. I can't help but feel there must be some sort of change, and as I stated in last post, I will make the comparison posts from pre-treatment to post-treatment readings.
On that note, my body is telling me it's time for bed. I am, and do get tired, but even feel my energy levels raising slightly. I know my body is working overtime to recoup from not only the treatment, but from this dame upper respiratory infection for which I have now undergone four rounds of 3 different antibiotics since Christmas. I believe that we are now on the healing path. I also continue to plug my supplements as they can't hurt, and I feel they have made a difference in the past as far as a healing potential.
I hope everyone enjoys the long Holiday weekend, I know I am looking forward to 3 days of more rest ... LOL ... and maybe some productive house work as well.
Be well!!!
Peace and Light
et
PS: Check out the new link off to the right for AdiStem. this is the biotech company which supplied the mechanism to the activation of my stemmies and the process in which they were returned to me. Some really good, scientific information for those that want to go a little deeper. I find this sort of reading REALLY interesting.
Thank God it's Friday ... and I only put in two days at work, and not even full days. I had no idea how hard these "little guys" would have to work, or that they would run a marathon to help fix 38 years of use and abuse. My lungs are hopefully on the mend as I am not sure how much more of this congestion/cough I can handle.
On another note, some changes that continue as the days go by. The bruise on my belly from the liposuction is completely gone!!! That in itself is pretty amazing stuff given I bruise easily and it usually takes a good two weeks for color to disappear. Two, my feet!! Absolutely incredible!! The bottoms of my feet are almost as smooth as a baby's butt!! I have been trying for several years to stay on top of my feet, calluses, dry skin from lack of circulation, etc. Spa treatments, heavy based creams to keep moisture in only work for a few hours, and in just one week, the bottoms of my feet look better than they have in years with just basic attention. Third, my continued stable blood sugars and decreased bolus to carb ratios is impressive, as well as the time it is taking to digest things. All this is huge, an indescribable feeling, and an ease in which I have not had in some time, well .... to be brutally honest, in the time it took me to get a grip on life, it was too late to fix some of the damage that had already been done. On top of those little tidbits, last night I was awoken by Maggie about 1:00AM, when she woke me I did feel a little on the warm side so we got up and went to the kitchen where my blood sugar read 68, not too bad given my track record, I proceeded to pour an 8 oz glass of juice and waited 30 minutes. Well .... if I had the lung capacity right now to cartwheel, I would!!! It only took 30 minutes to raise to 110!! and I didn't bolus anything to cover that juice and went back to bed, to awake to 168!! Not to shabby!!!
All these little changes are HUGE!!! I can't wait to see what is going to take place in the next 6-8 weeks when I was told my skin would undergo remarkable change being the largest organ in the body. I already see a difference in my skin tone and texture, especially those wrinkles which seemed to have deep seeded roots on the left side of my face!! All improving, and I can't help but feel that all the water (more then my normal 3-4 bottles a day) is helping in this process. I was ordered to have lab work done again in a couple of weeks, I can't wait to see what sort of results show up there, if any. I can't help but feel there must be some sort of change, and as I stated in last post, I will make the comparison posts from pre-treatment to post-treatment readings.
On that note, my body is telling me it's time for bed. I am, and do get tired, but even feel my energy levels raising slightly. I know my body is working overtime to recoup from not only the treatment, but from this dame upper respiratory infection for which I have now undergone four rounds of 3 different antibiotics since Christmas. I believe that we are now on the healing path. I also continue to plug my supplements as they can't hurt, and I feel they have made a difference in the past as far as a healing potential.
I hope everyone enjoys the long Holiday weekend, I know I am looking forward to 3 days of more rest ... LOL ... and maybe some productive house work as well.
Be well!!!
Peace and Light
et
PS: Check out the new link off to the right for AdiStem. this is the biotech company which supplied the mechanism to the activation of my stemmies and the process in which they were returned to me. Some really good, scientific information for those that want to go a little deeper. I find this sort of reading REALLY interesting.
Thursday, February 17, 2011
First day back at it ...
Hello ...
Well, I managed to get back to work today after a not-so-great night of sleep. I thought I was doing really well, until about 2 and then I decided to come home. I was having a hard time getting a good breath and it was like suddenly I just had to get some sleep. I got home and fell right to sleep for a little over an hour. My body is in serious "repair mode" and apparently, as I am told by my patient advocate, that it will take some time as there is a lot of work going on in here and those stem cells will not take a day off. I know that each day will get better and better, but this first week has been not only remarkable, but really like running some sort of marathon.
So ... I have pulled some numbers in which I will post over the weekend as far as what my blood work read prior to treatment, and what it will read after the fact, as we move ahead. So far, I can't believe how stable my blood sugars have been!! It is beyond even my belief. It has been so long since the "juggling" has been this easy. In 1995 I was diagnosed with the gastroparesis, a form of paralysis of the digestive tract. With this complication came months of a liquid diet, and then I began playing with what would, and what would not agree with my system, much to the annoyance of others at times. I try to not eat a lot in any one sitting, which makes for a pretty cheap date guys ... LOL ..... on the serious side, this kept dating to a minimal at best, and eating in general was just not something I enjoyed anymore. What to eat, how much to eat, how long would it "sit" in my gut before it hit the digestive process, which in turn threw insulin intake into a juggling act that since that time, has been a full-time+ job and often times, not a win-win situation. The timing is unpredictable, which is why I often time kept menu options to the "same shit, different day" .... since treatment last week I have continued to keep my meal options minimal, and simple, as I know pretty much how I respond, or so I thought. I have had movement in my gut that I have not had in years, food is moving through at a fast pace. I know this as my square wave bolus has had to be adjusted. This is all really good news and so unbelievable given the time frame since the treatment occurred. A few other things already mentioned was my skin texture is changing daily, and apparently very noticeable as everyone who encountered me today told me how wonderful I looked!!! My constant brain fog of long lasting effects has cleared to the point that my daughter is ecstatic already with changes she has seen. I have asked her to make entries into my journal for report to the doctors as someone who lives with me and has no doubt picked up on things that I tend to either forget, or never picked up on to start with. All I know, is that she is one nursing student that is on the cutting edge of potential for so many and seeing it first hand, from both sides, and becoming, like her mother, totally enraged as to why these practices are being silenced in the United States.
Anyway ... lots of changes still happening. I want to share all the dirty details, as embarrassing as some of it may be, it has been my life, and I can guarantee that it is a part of someone elses as well, and I want them to know, it can change, and it can change for the better!!! We need to collaboratively raise our voices and be heard as to what we want, and we want it now. There is no need for big pharmaceuticals to get rich off of people like me and so many like me, working class poor people that try the best they can even with insurance and often times must weigh pros and cons, and not always agreeing with a medical professional. In my opinion, and it has been my practice more so than not, that although doctors have a ton of education, and perhaps, personal experience, many of them, don't have a clue to the whole, real person they are dealing with. We are not all textbook, and I for one, can attest to that fact, as I have never done or responded text book to anything in my lifetime.
I have not forgot about the psychological factors playing in here either. There has been a lot to read, a lot to sort through, a lot to comprehend, often times when I was not coherent enough to know where I lived as I sat in my own living room, and now that the treatment has occurred, what will and can happen, how long will it take, how do I remain grounded and focused on what I believe in and to bring it forward to the powers that be, and make a change .... a change for the better. I get so frustrated .... with so many things.... and yet, I can only do what I have the power to do, and hope, with great hope, that people who have the power will step up and do what's right.
I hope you continue to follow me through this life changing phenomena ...
Peace and Light
et
Well, I managed to get back to work today after a not-so-great night of sleep. I thought I was doing really well, until about 2 and then I decided to come home. I was having a hard time getting a good breath and it was like suddenly I just had to get some sleep. I got home and fell right to sleep for a little over an hour. My body is in serious "repair mode" and apparently, as I am told by my patient advocate, that it will take some time as there is a lot of work going on in here and those stem cells will not take a day off. I know that each day will get better and better, but this first week has been not only remarkable, but really like running some sort of marathon.
So ... I have pulled some numbers in which I will post over the weekend as far as what my blood work read prior to treatment, and what it will read after the fact, as we move ahead. So far, I can't believe how stable my blood sugars have been!! It is beyond even my belief. It has been so long since the "juggling" has been this easy. In 1995 I was diagnosed with the gastroparesis, a form of paralysis of the digestive tract. With this complication came months of a liquid diet, and then I began playing with what would, and what would not agree with my system, much to the annoyance of others at times. I try to not eat a lot in any one sitting, which makes for a pretty cheap date guys ... LOL ..... on the serious side, this kept dating to a minimal at best, and eating in general was just not something I enjoyed anymore. What to eat, how much to eat, how long would it "sit" in my gut before it hit the digestive process, which in turn threw insulin intake into a juggling act that since that time, has been a full-time+ job and often times, not a win-win situation. The timing is unpredictable, which is why I often time kept menu options to the "same shit, different day" .... since treatment last week I have continued to keep my meal options minimal, and simple, as I know pretty much how I respond, or so I thought. I have had movement in my gut that I have not had in years, food is moving through at a fast pace. I know this as my square wave bolus has had to be adjusted. This is all really good news and so unbelievable given the time frame since the treatment occurred. A few other things already mentioned was my skin texture is changing daily, and apparently very noticeable as everyone who encountered me today told me how wonderful I looked!!! My constant brain fog of long lasting effects has cleared to the point that my daughter is ecstatic already with changes she has seen. I have asked her to make entries into my journal for report to the doctors as someone who lives with me and has no doubt picked up on things that I tend to either forget, or never picked up on to start with. All I know, is that she is one nursing student that is on the cutting edge of potential for so many and seeing it first hand, from both sides, and becoming, like her mother, totally enraged as to why these practices are being silenced in the United States.
Anyway ... lots of changes still happening. I want to share all the dirty details, as embarrassing as some of it may be, it has been my life, and I can guarantee that it is a part of someone elses as well, and I want them to know, it can change, and it can change for the better!!! We need to collaboratively raise our voices and be heard as to what we want, and we want it now. There is no need for big pharmaceuticals to get rich off of people like me and so many like me, working class poor people that try the best they can even with insurance and often times must weigh pros and cons, and not always agreeing with a medical professional. In my opinion, and it has been my practice more so than not, that although doctors have a ton of education, and perhaps, personal experience, many of them, don't have a clue to the whole, real person they are dealing with. We are not all textbook, and I for one, can attest to that fact, as I have never done or responded text book to anything in my lifetime.
I have not forgot about the psychological factors playing in here either. There has been a lot to read, a lot to sort through, a lot to comprehend, often times when I was not coherent enough to know where I lived as I sat in my own living room, and now that the treatment has occurred, what will and can happen, how long will it take, how do I remain grounded and focused on what I believe in and to bring it forward to the powers that be, and make a change .... a change for the better. I get so frustrated .... with so many things.... and yet, I can only do what I have the power to do, and hope, with great hope, that people who have the power will step up and do what's right.
I hope you continue to follow me through this life changing phenomena ...
Peace and Light
et
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
Hump Day ...
Good Morning !!!
I slept like a baby last night. The wheezing has finally subsided to the point of full breaths. I am still slightly congested, but I am hoping that today, I can actually do something productive, like laundry, without being winded before I get across the kitchen. Hillary and I are going to try .... see how my progress goes ... I am sure that a short nap may be in my afternoon agenda. :)
Other than that, I continue to feels some very positive changes happening, brain fog seems clear .... that is without any $$ down, one of the best features so far as I have been so clouded, overwhelmed, just downright no real thought process outside of what I may have been involved in at any one moment. Sort of like a stroke patient that can think it, but can't speak it .... (hope that makes sense). My eye sight seems to be the clearest it has been in a long time, no real fuzzy stuff going on. My skin continues to show positive improvement ... blood sugars have been excellent, with just some small tweaking of the bolus ratio going on due to what appears to be a change in absorbtion ... so all of this is good news, and remains under the monitoring.
As has been stated, this treatment is not yet a cure, but I still beleive that it is the ultimate potential for Type I's. It will be a process in which I wean off, as oposed to what happened when first diagnosed, total bottom out, shut down, death .... it took me 38 years of use and abuse to get to this point, it will not clear and be "all better" over night. My research will continue into the how's, why's and why not's ..... LOL ..... and I can't thank those that are following this and hopefully talking about it among your respective groups to peak interest and action.
Here's to a great day!!
Peace and Light
et
I slept like a baby last night. The wheezing has finally subsided to the point of full breaths. I am still slightly congested, but I am hoping that today, I can actually do something productive, like laundry, without being winded before I get across the kitchen. Hillary and I are going to try .... see how my progress goes ... I am sure that a short nap may be in my afternoon agenda. :)
Other than that, I continue to feels some very positive changes happening, brain fog seems clear .... that is without any $$ down, one of the best features so far as I have been so clouded, overwhelmed, just downright no real thought process outside of what I may have been involved in at any one moment. Sort of like a stroke patient that can think it, but can't speak it .... (hope that makes sense). My eye sight seems to be the clearest it has been in a long time, no real fuzzy stuff going on. My skin continues to show positive improvement ... blood sugars have been excellent, with just some small tweaking of the bolus ratio going on due to what appears to be a change in absorbtion ... so all of this is good news, and remains under the monitoring.
As has been stated, this treatment is not yet a cure, but I still beleive that it is the ultimate potential for Type I's. It will be a process in which I wean off, as oposed to what happened when first diagnosed, total bottom out, shut down, death .... it took me 38 years of use and abuse to get to this point, it will not clear and be "all better" over night. My research will continue into the how's, why's and why not's ..... LOL ..... and I can't thank those that are following this and hopefully talking about it among your respective groups to peak interest and action.
Here's to a great day!!
Peace and Light
et
Tuesday, February 15, 2011
Land of the Free ....
Hello !!!
I have been doing a lot of resting. I also, am feeling a bit better in the upper respiratory department. I have been up most of the night and think my lungs are somewhere up the street now. I finished my antibiotics this morning, continue to clear some "gunk" from my lungs, and still feel very good overall. My blood sugars have been remarkably stable .... I have no real definition except this treatment process. This process has made noticeable changes already and it has not even been a week, I can only imagine what sort of benefits might surface in the next weeks and months.
On another note, I have become aware of and FDA standing that has my blood boiling beyond belief. I will post below links to a couple of postings in regard to this type of treatment, and why the US seems to feel that profit trumps principal. That certainly makes us look good in the face of other regions of the world when our people, and few in comparison, can afford to go abroad to seek these sorts of treatments. It's wrong on so many levels. Just something to peek another level of interest on the topic for so many, like those who suffer from 100+ diseases/disorders.
Check out the reading and let me know .... I would love to know I was not the only person who had an opinion on this. We need to make our voices be heard and not allowed to be locked into drug treatments where the costs, and/or side effects alone are so much more damaging than the issue to be treated.
With that being said, I continue to make progress and received an email telling me that I should look for much more in the weeks to come, my skin, being the largest organ in the body, showing some amazing results, which I am already beginning to see changes. The wrinkles, especially on one side of my face, seemed to be so deep, that I felt like I was about 80, not 47, and all without "upgrading my wrinkle cream" as mu mother had suggested to me just two years ago. So I hope you continue to follow the happenings, and that perhaps together we can come up with some sort of plan to bring this to the front and center of what matters to people who are losing hope.
Thanks for continued prayers and support for those are what keeps us human and real.
http://repairstemcell.wordpress.com/diabetes-stem-cells/
The above link, (cut and paste into your browser) will show that some of this debate has been going on since the 90's. Seems my mother had a very "right-on" perception of how this would play out years ago when she would make comments on topics that make the news, but never seem to make it to the people. NOTHING, should take 20-30 years for approval, and it seems as though the FDA doesn't seem to give all these wonder drugs their long-term trials before cutting them loose to the public to make billions of dollars, and yet still, string the people along on cures. Our government is killing us, and that is how I feel about this topic on so many levels. Having dealt with the medical aspects of my mothers multiple disease processes, and the number of people who suffer from those comorbidities that make life almost impossible, both emotionally and financially. What makes this sort of game play something a country wants to look up to??? We have many, many, passionate, intelligent doctors and scientists in this country, why can't we collaborate with those around the world for true global peace and prosperity. Greed has really become a very unattractive aspect of this society and I for one, am ashamed to be a part of it. Bill of Rights, The Constitution, The Bible, is this what we have all been taught to do ..... ???
Questions I am tired of pondering and want results. Looks like I may have a new career goal ... LMAO .... radical advocate for the people .... I know I am fighting for myself at this point, but know, deep down, that if it were a loved one, a friend, or even a stranger I have encountered in life, (and have) that moves us to do something so far beyond reach that we actually make a dent ... how rewarding ... and it need not come with so many zeros that one can't make out a dollar amount ... to me that is priceless!!!
Peace and Light for continued health and happiness!!!
et
I have been doing a lot of resting. I also, am feeling a bit better in the upper respiratory department. I have been up most of the night and think my lungs are somewhere up the street now. I finished my antibiotics this morning, continue to clear some "gunk" from my lungs, and still feel very good overall. My blood sugars have been remarkably stable .... I have no real definition except this treatment process. This process has made noticeable changes already and it has not even been a week, I can only imagine what sort of benefits might surface in the next weeks and months.
On another note, I have become aware of and FDA standing that has my blood boiling beyond belief. I will post below links to a couple of postings in regard to this type of treatment, and why the US seems to feel that profit trumps principal. That certainly makes us look good in the face of other regions of the world when our people, and few in comparison, can afford to go abroad to seek these sorts of treatments. It's wrong on so many levels. Just something to peek another level of interest on the topic for so many, like those who suffer from 100+ diseases/disorders.
Check out the reading and let me know .... I would love to know I was not the only person who had an opinion on this. We need to make our voices be heard and not allowed to be locked into drug treatments where the costs, and/or side effects alone are so much more damaging than the issue to be treated.
With that being said, I continue to make progress and received an email telling me that I should look for much more in the weeks to come, my skin, being the largest organ in the body, showing some amazing results, which I am already beginning to see changes. The wrinkles, especially on one side of my face, seemed to be so deep, that I felt like I was about 80, not 47, and all without "upgrading my wrinkle cream" as mu mother had suggested to me just two years ago. So I hope you continue to follow the happenings, and that perhaps together we can come up with some sort of plan to bring this to the front and center of what matters to people who are losing hope.
Thanks for continued prayers and support for those are what keeps us human and real.
http://repairstemcell.wordpress.com/diabetes-stem-cells/
The above link, (cut and paste into your browser) will show that some of this debate has been going on since the 90's. Seems my mother had a very "right-on" perception of how this would play out years ago when she would make comments on topics that make the news, but never seem to make it to the people. NOTHING, should take 20-30 years for approval, and it seems as though the FDA doesn't seem to give all these wonder drugs their long-term trials before cutting them loose to the public to make billions of dollars, and yet still, string the people along on cures. Our government is killing us, and that is how I feel about this topic on so many levels. Having dealt with the medical aspects of my mothers multiple disease processes, and the number of people who suffer from those comorbidities that make life almost impossible, both emotionally and financially. What makes this sort of game play something a country wants to look up to??? We have many, many, passionate, intelligent doctors and scientists in this country, why can't we collaborate with those around the world for true global peace and prosperity. Greed has really become a very unattractive aspect of this society and I for one, am ashamed to be a part of it. Bill of Rights, The Constitution, The Bible, is this what we have all been taught to do ..... ???
Questions I am tired of pondering and want results. Looks like I may have a new career goal ... LMAO .... radical advocate for the people .... I know I am fighting for myself at this point, but know, deep down, that if it were a loved one, a friend, or even a stranger I have encountered in life, (and have) that moves us to do something so far beyond reach that we actually make a dent ... how rewarding ... and it need not come with so many zeros that one can't make out a dollar amount ... to me that is priceless!!!
Peace and Light for continued health and happiness!!!
et
Friday, February 11, 2011
A new beginning ...
Good Evening to everyone!!!
I am so enthusiastic to say the least. I have been trying to take everything I have encountered over the last 48 hours since treatment in and process it as it has been totally and just beyond belief!!!
First off, my day on Weds. started off a little late. Weather related traffic issues held up the doctor's arrival at the hotel. He arrived, and we all loaded into two cars to travel the 15 minutes over the boarder to the clinic. I was asked to ride with the President of the International Stem Cell Institute, the doctor, one other repeat patient, and myself. It was the first in what I would consider many little blessings and opportunities to hit me throughout the day.
Upon arrival, I had some wonderful conversation with Rita Alexander, the founder of ISCI. She is an amazing woman in what she has created and it trying to present to the powers that be. She too, has undergone treatment, and did so that day as well, and I can now say, that I was a believer before, now ... I can't say enough about the potential of this treatment to help SO many individuals!!!
I am back in Phoenix since last evening. First thing I did was unwrap the bandages and take a hot shower. Given what was done, and knowing that bruising is an inevitable process of the liposuction, mini or otherwise, the photo here will show you, I am healing VERY WELL!!! This is part of the process and was just amazing as I bruise very easily to begin with. The care was phenomenal!! Once you got past the differences of the clinic compared to anything you might see here in the US, I can tell you honestly and emphatically that the care was tremendous!! My nurse, who was just the cutest little thing, young, reminded me of a little Dora the Explorer, was the only one, other than the Doctor who spoke English as well as Spanish, so she did a wonderful job translating for both me and other team members, i.e., the lab tech, another nurse, etc. The Doctor was an amazing man. Passionate does not begin to describe his investment in this treatment and procedure. I can't begin to thank him enough for showing me and talking with me about all the prospective possibilities he and I both hope for in this area of medicine. He was an absolute doll. He sees things in fat no one else would ever dream of looking at, and he made them a reality for me.
As I stated before, we were at the clinic all day, I began my process approximately 10 am, being taken to the operating room after having blood drawn. Once in the OR I wasn't nervous, only apprehensive as we had not yet started an IV and that, as I have stated, and so many of you know, is always a challenge at best. After some bilingual conversation and looking around, the anesthesiologist, who was a doctor, and an absolutely beautiful woman, who didn't speak English, LOL, started to make comments, and went from arm to arm, then she points at my wrist, not my idea of the best place as it is incredibly painful area for a line. The doctor then stands at the head of the bed, places my face in his hands, ever so gently and tells me to just relax, breathe, don't move, she is one of the best, and "look at me sweetheart" and poke, she was in!!! That in itself was a freaking miracle, as it hasn't happened in my recent recollection. Ok ... well .... now we are ready, the mask goes on, the doctor tells me to just relax and go to "twilight sleep" and off I went. The only thing I remember was a movement in my abdomen where he must have been removing the fat (adipose) tissue. Next thing I know, I am back in my bed, resting comfortably while the process begins in the lab to wake my stemmies up. That process was ready to roll at approximately 2 pm. In that time, I was shown what they looked like in the syringe prior to them being mixed with the solution to inject them via my IV. They were the most beautiful shade of fushcia!! .... once mixed they became the pink shown in the photo here. The whole process of drip time was about 90-2 hours. As this was taking place, I just lay waiting, resting, dozing off, and the doctor and the nurse would check in and ask if I was ok, how was I doing, did I need anything. The doctor came in multiple times as I could be heard coughing throughout the small clinic. He started a nebulizer treatment and I sucked down 2 doses of that (about 20 minutes each), and that made a huge difference in my ability to breathe. Ok, so ... while laying there I began to feel warm, a strange feeling in my feet, which have signs of neuropathy, when the doctor came in again, I asked him, could this be nerves "waking up?", he smiles this big ass grin and says "C" "Yes," he was so great in spite of the language barrier in communicating with me, I really felt like something special. I dozed off again. Next time in, he made a comment about how I had more color in my face .... I wanted to ask him if my wrinkles were dissipating ... LOL ...he said it was a good sign of things "happening." So I finished it all up. No complications, no real pain, I was prescribed the antibiotic, a cough "tussin", and off I went to the waiting room to wait for the other patient and his wife to finish up his drip time. We all headed back to the US about 7:30ish.
I was exhausted, but exhilarated. Wanted to make sure I didn't over-react to anything, to just get back, have something to eat, and call it a night, which I did. I awoke about 2:30 that morning (5-6 hours later) to discover that I had a strange sensation in my digestive track, stomach, lower belly, and lots of noise. This, as many of you know and will confirm, has been an issue of pain and suffering for me for many years. The gastroparesis, nerve damage from the diabetes. ..... ok... well ... this piece of info may be TMI for some, but to a doctor, and to myself, it is totally freaking AMAZING, it was the awakening of nerves which have been paralyzed since 1995 (if not longer, but that was when it was dx). Thursday morning, I "went" ... almost like a regular person!! I had my breakfast, washed, dressed, packed and went to the airport. It was a long day of traveling and with my belly doing all kinds of moving around, and my lungs also taking in a lot of those little builders/repairmen, I just took things slow. Long story short, I arrived in Phoenix, was picked up at the airport, and proceeded to come back and well.... cause a drainage problem!!! I was laughing so hard in the bathroom my friends were yelling from the other room, "ARE YOU ALRIGHT!!!!" OMG .... like I said, most of you may be laughing right now knowing what I am going on and on about, some others, might be sort of grossed out. But let me tell you this, when something is "regular" it is a big-ass deal, and when it's NOT, mama is not always a happy, comfy camper!!! To make it better, today was another excellent day!!! and this has not happened in this manner in MANY years .... I have been known to go days and up to a week or more without going. All good signs. Things are happening.
One more noticeable happening before I call it a night to rest is that my blood sugars have been very stable in the last 48 hours, the best in many, many years, or so it seems. Upon arrival in Phoenix last night, I had met this really great young woman on the plane and we talked the whole trip from Houston to Phoenix. She was interested in what I had just underwent, and boy did we laugh a few times. Anyway, as we were leaving the airplane, I started to feel a little fuzzy, warm, and by the time we were up the gateway, I had to drop my bag and lean against the wall. This sweet young woman, from Louisiana ;), was my little guardian angel, she came back, said, "give me that bag" and walked with me up to the waiting area. Told me to make my call and she would use the restroom and be right back. While she was away, I checked my blood sugar, 76, I was thinking, were these signs?? I haven't had signs of an oncoming low for many years, they just hit, boom, and no real warnings, i.e., the warmth, until it hits 38 or lower. When telling Hillary this happening she said, "document it in your journal", "this is HUGE Mom!!" This sort of thing, happened again this evening, when I awoke I felt warm, checked, 68, I got up and had my dinner. But ... what was really nice, and so unheard of these days, was that it wasn't emergency mode, I didn't have to fumble around, I had clarity in my head to know what was happening, it was/is so totally new, unusual, and long time since any of these signs or symptoms of shown face.
I spent most of today just resting, sleeping, up, eat, read a little, back to bed, which is what I am going to do now. I am so happy, overwhelmed, I really can't find a good word to describe what is happening to my body, and I am so grateful for this opportunity, and hope to promote this treatment, the science, the medicine, to anyone and everyone who will listen and have an open mind, IT WORKS!!! The human repair kit is the line on a pamphlet I got and that is true, yet seems like an understatement. It was all mine to start with, we just needed the knowledge, and expertise, the passion of a man who sees things in fat that no one else would look at. Now I know he didn't do this single handed, but he is, for me, an angel who shares my passion for cures and treatments that seem more natural, more human, and should by no means be held up in the manner of "who is going to make the most bucks?" for the US ... lets plow through some of the politics and get down to the heart of the matter here, human compassion for healing.
Ok ... well .... I am going to sleep now, until I come up with some more, and I have more, so much more, my enthusiasm for what is happening just seems muted in words, you should hear me ramble on in speech about this, and how I believe it sounds, and what strangers have seemed to witness in just the past couple of days!!! PHENOMENAL is an understatement.
Peace, Love, and Light and for all the prayers!!
I felt all of the warmth as I underwent this procedure, and they are so greatly appreciated!!!
ET
Wednesday, February 9, 2011
It's all good
I am back at the hotel ... the day was VERY long, didn't sleep well last night.
Everything went very well and I have lots to share, but not tonight. I just had a little bit to eat, and doctor orders were to try and just rest for the next few days, in part as I have this nasty cough that hadn't gone away prior to treatment. The doctor treated me, and I have another round of antibiotic, one for the cough, two cause I am a diabetic, and three, well they just did a mini liposuction that I am about to blow stitches out of with the hard coughing I am doing. so ... with that being said, I really do feel better ... LOL .... it is just this cough ... which I heard multiple people yesterday on all planes doing .... anyway ... I will post lots of really cool details and some fasinating results when I get back to phoenix. This is a truly remarkable and rewarding treatment and I want to share it with those that are interested in the possibilities.
thanks for all the love, light, prayers, good vibes and energy, I felt them with me all day in great warmth!!!
Peace and Light
Sleep well
ET
Everything went very well and I have lots to share, but not tonight. I just had a little bit to eat, and doctor orders were to try and just rest for the next few days, in part as I have this nasty cough that hadn't gone away prior to treatment. The doctor treated me, and I have another round of antibiotic, one for the cough, two cause I am a diabetic, and three, well they just did a mini liposuction that I am about to blow stitches out of with the hard coughing I am doing. so ... with that being said, I really do feel better ... LOL .... it is just this cough ... which I heard multiple people yesterday on all planes doing .... anyway ... I will post lots of really cool details and some fasinating results when I get back to phoenix. This is a truly remarkable and rewarding treatment and I want to share it with those that are interested in the possibilities.
thanks for all the love, light, prayers, good vibes and energy, I felt them with me all day in great warmth!!!
Peace and Light
Sleep well
ET
"Today" .... has arrived ....
Good Morning!!!
Well, in spite of an exceptionally restless nights sleep, full of that asthma like cough I get and have had for what seems like weeks, today, life is about to change for me. I feel it (in more ways than one), and can't help but be a little anxious. One cannot think that there is not a psychological aspect to an undertaking like this ... although I have so much support, encouragement, excitement, etc, there is, for me, a feeling of uncertainty. Uncertainty in the aspect that I know life as no other way than I have been coping with it for so many years. The other night when I was repacking a smaller bag to travel out of a bigger bag, my friend came into the bedroom and said "holy crap, I can't imagine having to take all this stuff everyday of my life," ... that was on top of other daily meds, clothes, and those things that are needed for travel. Did you remember the passport? airline ticket? blow dryer?? (LOL .... you all know I haven't used one of those in years!!). It is the only life I know..... and I can't help but believe ... that is about to change. I have so much to share already, just not the time, and I so want to share this as it can help SO many people who are afflicted with many, many diseases and age related illness. I HOPE to be living proof for some ...
It is going to be a very long day, and of course, I am up about an hour prior to really having to be ... alarm is just about to go off ... lol ... I will try hard to take in as much as possible today so that I can share with you all the experience, a part of the psychological aspect of this change in so many ways for me. I really wish they would let me up out of the OR to go to the lab and watch my cells "come to life" .... but .... Hilly was a little bummed she couldn't be here with me, but when I told her that, she was really disappointed, we have a strange relationship...LOL ... I know she loves and worries about me, but together, we both have the knowledge, and wisdom, to want to know more, and learning about the body and its capabilities ... is a TOTALLY WICKED experience!! :D we have the ability to repair ourselves ... how amazing is that??!!??
Will enlighten you all later this evening .... and I will do my best to rest, relax, take it all in, embrace it, let go of all the negative energy that has been inhibiting my big, old body, and HOPE for that new, fresh start ... it is just a stepping stone, it is not a cure, I know this, but .... the positives of this treatment FAR outweigh the negative ... and I will show you this and together, get the word out that we need not have to suffer to enjoy life!!!
Have a wonderful day my friends ....
Be well ...
Peace, Light, and Love !!!!
Et
Well, in spite of an exceptionally restless nights sleep, full of that asthma like cough I get and have had for what seems like weeks, today, life is about to change for me. I feel it (in more ways than one), and can't help but be a little anxious. One cannot think that there is not a psychological aspect to an undertaking like this ... although I have so much support, encouragement, excitement, etc, there is, for me, a feeling of uncertainty. Uncertainty in the aspect that I know life as no other way than I have been coping with it for so many years. The other night when I was repacking a smaller bag to travel out of a bigger bag, my friend came into the bedroom and said "holy crap, I can't imagine having to take all this stuff everyday of my life," ... that was on top of other daily meds, clothes, and those things that are needed for travel. Did you remember the passport? airline ticket? blow dryer?? (LOL .... you all know I haven't used one of those in years!!). It is the only life I know..... and I can't help but believe ... that is about to change. I have so much to share already, just not the time, and I so want to share this as it can help SO many people who are afflicted with many, many diseases and age related illness. I HOPE to be living proof for some ...
It is going to be a very long day, and of course, I am up about an hour prior to really having to be ... alarm is just about to go off ... lol ... I will try hard to take in as much as possible today so that I can share with you all the experience, a part of the psychological aspect of this change in so many ways for me. I really wish they would let me up out of the OR to go to the lab and watch my cells "come to life" .... but .... Hilly was a little bummed she couldn't be here with me, but when I told her that, she was really disappointed, we have a strange relationship...LOL ... I know she loves and worries about me, but together, we both have the knowledge, and wisdom, to want to know more, and learning about the body and its capabilities ... is a TOTALLY WICKED experience!! :D we have the ability to repair ourselves ... how amazing is that??!!??
Will enlighten you all later this evening .... and I will do my best to rest, relax, take it all in, embrace it, let go of all the negative energy that has been inhibiting my big, old body, and HOPE for that new, fresh start ... it is just a stepping stone, it is not a cure, I know this, but .... the positives of this treatment FAR outweigh the negative ... and I will show you this and together, get the word out that we need not have to suffer to enjoy life!!!
Have a wonderful day my friends ....
Be well ...
Peace, Light, and Love !!!!
Et
Tuesday, February 8, 2011
I have arrived ...
Just a quickie ... as I am totally exhausted, don't travel as well as I once did.
I made it, a very long day, not a lot to eat, feeling like crap with this URI creating a lot of noise ....
Had dinner, some interesting encounters to share, and a day tomorrow that will no doubt be long, and life changeing. Hillary was disappointed earlier when I told her that the support person could go back to the lab and watch my cells come to life .... TOTALLY AMAZEING!!!
I can't wait to share this experience with you all, for fighting with me on this journey, and a continued hope to bring this science to the states and the people who need it most!!!!
Peace and Light
ET
I made it, a very long day, not a lot to eat, feeling like crap with this URI creating a lot of noise ....
Had dinner, some interesting encounters to share, and a day tomorrow that will no doubt be long, and life changeing. Hillary was disappointed earlier when I told her that the support person could go back to the lab and watch my cells come to life .... TOTALLY AMAZEING!!!
I can't wait to share this experience with you all, for fighting with me on this journey, and a continued hope to bring this science to the states and the people who need it most!!!!
Peace and Light
ET
Sunday, February 6, 2011
tick-tock ....
G'evening ....
Most are no doubt preoccupied with the Super Bowl .... I am not a real big football fan, I prefer a good hockey, basketball, or baseball game. Anyway ... while I am sitting her brain dead ....
I spent 3 hours messing around looking for one bag, which turns out, I no longer own .... I know my mother had one, so I called my father and had him pull hers out, I will pick it up on my way out of town tomorrow.
Everyone keeps telling me how excited they are for me, how excited I should be ... I think I am shell-shocked .... I am excited, this is big stuff, cutting edge science, and I am playing a part..... but .... now that it is on my doorstep, I am so unsure of what to expect...??? I know not how to live my life without all the juggling. I know that monitoring will be crucial now, more so than ever before as we hope the rate will drop, and I am frightened as to how fast I could bottom out, will I get those warning signs back, how long will it take, etc .... there are a million scenarios running through my head lately. For the past week and a half, I have not only been fighting this upper respiratory infection, but my gut has been on a total rampage, nerves .... and I have been trying to pump my system with those things that help my immune system, which I swear gets worse every year. It seems to take ma longer and longer to get over something when I use to heal so well, and bounce right back ... LOL ... ya, ya, I know, I am not as young as I use to be, and I have never been the healthiest of people. Even now, I go to a new doctor, like this new PCP, and he looks at my records, then he looks at me ans spews ... "WOW ... You are like a miricle!!!" .... What the hell is that suppose to invoke??? (Hillary tells me it is because most of the diabetic patients they see at the hospital are in with missing limbs, renal failure, just rotting out .... not in good shape, and very visable .... so.... I guess that means I don't look as bad as I feel.... LMAO .....
I am nervous, but not about the travel, or the procedure, it is all about the "what if" after ....what to expect?? Every person is different, and I can attest that I have rarely done or followed any text book these doctors are taught with. I have found that most doctors and medical staff I have worked with over the years, with very few exceptions, have really gotten into the challenge, I try and make their jobs as easy as possible knowing that my body most likely isn't going to cooperate as they think it should ... LOL ... small vessels, odd responses, hard to put down, keep down, often hard to wake up .... one big challenge I am.
Anyway ... just wanted to let everyone know I am still plugging away trying to prep myself. I guess I really won't know any more until I get there. We will have an orientation on Tuesday evening with the doctor, patient advocate, etc, to review the process, what to expect, after care, and follow up ....
Please know that all of your excitement is wonderful to see ... but I am just not that bubbly yet ... I hope to be... I hope that a radiant glow, with less wrinkles, and better stamina, on top of the multiple benefits that are predicted .... I just know this can't be wrong, but, I also know that I will most likely require a second treatment .... there is a lot of work ahead of me .... sometime, it seems like an awful lot of fight to just stay above ground and no real time or energy to enjoy even the simple things in life. I have always been very independant, do it yourself kind of girl, these days, as I get older, I think I need an assistant ... and we all know how I hate to ask for help, so this person need be of the unconditional, openminded, type. ..... ok..... another story I guess ....
I have to go pull it together with the final details being completed tomorrow and my ride down to the Valley of the Sun. I fly out late Tuesday morning .... I will try and post after my staffing, if not, will try VERY hard to post after the treatment while laying quietly in my hotel room.
Thanks to all .... you love, support, guidance, words of encouragement are more than any one could ever ask for, and you have all given so freely for me ... I am deeply touched .... in hopes of fighting on long and hard for those others that can benefit..... Peace and Light ~ ET
Most are no doubt preoccupied with the Super Bowl .... I am not a real big football fan, I prefer a good hockey, basketball, or baseball game. Anyway ... while I am sitting her brain dead ....
I spent 3 hours messing around looking for one bag, which turns out, I no longer own .... I know my mother had one, so I called my father and had him pull hers out, I will pick it up on my way out of town tomorrow.
Everyone keeps telling me how excited they are for me, how excited I should be ... I think I am shell-shocked .... I am excited, this is big stuff, cutting edge science, and I am playing a part..... but .... now that it is on my doorstep, I am so unsure of what to expect...??? I know not how to live my life without all the juggling. I know that monitoring will be crucial now, more so than ever before as we hope the rate will drop, and I am frightened as to how fast I could bottom out, will I get those warning signs back, how long will it take, etc .... there are a million scenarios running through my head lately. For the past week and a half, I have not only been fighting this upper respiratory infection, but my gut has been on a total rampage, nerves .... and I have been trying to pump my system with those things that help my immune system, which I swear gets worse every year. It seems to take ma longer and longer to get over something when I use to heal so well, and bounce right back ... LOL ... ya, ya, I know, I am not as young as I use to be, and I have never been the healthiest of people. Even now, I go to a new doctor, like this new PCP, and he looks at my records, then he looks at me ans spews ... "WOW ... You are like a miricle!!!" .... What the hell is that suppose to invoke??? (Hillary tells me it is because most of the diabetic patients they see at the hospital are in with missing limbs, renal failure, just rotting out .... not in good shape, and very visable .... so.... I guess that means I don't look as bad as I feel.... LMAO .....
I am nervous, but not about the travel, or the procedure, it is all about the "what if" after ....what to expect?? Every person is different, and I can attest that I have rarely done or followed any text book these doctors are taught with. I have found that most doctors and medical staff I have worked with over the years, with very few exceptions, have really gotten into the challenge, I try and make their jobs as easy as possible knowing that my body most likely isn't going to cooperate as they think it should ... LOL ... small vessels, odd responses, hard to put down, keep down, often hard to wake up .... one big challenge I am.
Anyway ... just wanted to let everyone know I am still plugging away trying to prep myself. I guess I really won't know any more until I get there. We will have an orientation on Tuesday evening with the doctor, patient advocate, etc, to review the process, what to expect, after care, and follow up ....
Please know that all of your excitement is wonderful to see ... but I am just not that bubbly yet ... I hope to be... I hope that a radiant glow, with less wrinkles, and better stamina, on top of the multiple benefits that are predicted .... I just know this can't be wrong, but, I also know that I will most likely require a second treatment .... there is a lot of work ahead of me .... sometime, it seems like an awful lot of fight to just stay above ground and no real time or energy to enjoy even the simple things in life. I have always been very independant, do it yourself kind of girl, these days, as I get older, I think I need an assistant ... and we all know how I hate to ask for help, so this person need be of the unconditional, openminded, type. ..... ok..... another story I guess ....
I have to go pull it together with the final details being completed tomorrow and my ride down to the Valley of the Sun. I fly out late Tuesday morning .... I will try and post after my staffing, if not, will try VERY hard to post after the treatment while laying quietly in my hotel room.
Thanks to all .... you love, support, guidance, words of encouragement are more than any one could ever ask for, and you have all given so freely for me ... I am deeply touched .... in hopes of fighting on long and hard for those others that can benefit..... Peace and Light ~ ET
Saturday, February 5, 2011
My guide lately has been .....
This is Jizo .... a Buddhist guide that is the protector of women, children, and travelers .... I think I fell in love with him when I saw him (I think he is just too adorable!!), and then I learned about his meaning and traditions .... he will help me through all that is about to take place .....
BELIEVE ....( I go where I think I can find the most guidance and inspiration to keep going ...)
Just some thoughts ...
Happy Saturday!!!
I am still sort of "catatonic" as Hilly would describe in the realm of this becoming a reality for me. I have been just trying to stay focused on work, taking care of things that need the day-to-day attention. Oh, and not to mention the childlike, selfish needs of my father, who has a knack for pushing my buttons. I try very hard not to let him get to me, but really, it is so beyond my comprehension at times as to how one man can be so stupid, so self-centered, don't care about you, take care of me attitude that I honestly don't know how my mother tolerated this sort of behavior for 60 years!!! Anyway, once I get his errands taken care of this afternoon, and listen to what will undoubtedly be 3 hours of ranting about nothing, and no concern what so ever for what is happening now, and wanting nothing more than for me to take him to a casino so he can blow $$ that a brother or 2 may have sent him (which is NOT going to happen this weekend!) I can come home and collect all the things that need to come with me on the trip.
I have been on another round of antibiotic this week, last dose tomorrow for an upper respiratory infection, which I believe just went from my head in November, to my chest now, as this has been the 3rd round of antibiotic since that time. Not exactly the state I wanted to be in going into treatment. I have been trying hard to pump clear fluids (my love of coffee hasn't been so much last couple of weeks:(); fruits, and my whole food supplements as I can't seem to eat as much of this stuff as appears to be recommended. I believe my "Juice Plus" has helped me get through so many of these surgeries, procedures, just keeping me going in a healthy manner, and the stuff has been studied world wide to prove this fact. It's good shit!!!! LOL ....
This past couple of weeks has been .... well ..... I can't come up with a descriptive right now. Work was okay ... I remained focused (not sure how), met my deadlines, tried very hard to get as much work ready for my girls ... hehehe ... so they have work while I am out. They will anyway as a system has been placed to get this done while I am out. They are all such wonderful women, have been so supportive of me, it is really a great feeling to have people in our lives that are so acceptive of each other, we all have trials that require a little extra support from our friends. One woman in our office had two sons leave for boot camp this week, and yet, yesterday, she was so totally apologetic to me, I so would not have expected anything less from her, I can't imagine the anxiety involved in sending our children off to the situations going on in our military today. Absolutely no apologies are needed on my end my friend. My prayers are with you and your boys during this trying time. Another working peer as you might address, came forward after what seemed like several months of chaos to make ammends of sorts, that was ...... not only a shock, but, openly I took it in, and it seemed sincere, I will, however, at this time, not dwell on this topic, remain cautious, and just allow the stars to flow ..... I am not a big fan of being used as a door mat when I really don't have the energy to go about my life with lies and deciept. My objective is to ... as the New Hampshire state motto says ... "Live and Let Live" .... I do not go about life to hurt, destroy, undermine, not into the drama, usually can't remember what I did last week, lol .... I take great pleasure in small conversations, sharing lifes trials and triumphs, the whole live, laugh, love mentality. It is what keeps me content and grounded. Whatever happens ... well .... it must have been meant to be.
Ok ... moving on .... Hillary and I have interacted well this week. I think she knows I am so preoccupied with what is about to happen. I know she would like nothing more than to accompany me, I know she is worried about me traveling alone and not being able to response fast enough to a drastic low. I am prepared to take the extra precautions as we hope for the decreased insulin intake. It is going to require my utmost attention to stay on top. Little does any one know, this factor has me scared to death!!!! Yes, I do have fears, my mother use to tell me she thought I dealt with my disease in such a "graceful manner" ... LMAO ... I very often did not share with her that certain happenings scared the shit out of me, and I often times have wondered myself, "how did I survive that one??" .... it is not a feeling I would wish upon anyone. The loss of time, memory so it seems as time goes on, .... it can be debilitating if one were to dwell on it. I think ... and I truly believe I learned this quality from my mother, you do what you can with what you have, plow forward knowing right from wrong, and hope for the best .... Oh, and ... let's add a little laughter ... because as we both did for so many years, find something in the darkest of situations ... to laugh about, even if it reflected back on us. It helps, it keeps us real, grounded, HUMAN. Everyone has trials, life is not all roses and wine ... it is "full of pricks" as my mother use to say ... LMAO ... it was how we cope and deal with these irritations that makes us stronger people.
Back to Hillary, she had a clinical day yesterday and was assigned to the emergency room. OMG!!! Talk about the kid finding her element ... she was pumped beyond excitement when I picked her up last night. (We have been carpooling this week as her truck is in the shop). She was a nonstop motor mouth for the 30 minute ride home and another 30-45 minutes when we got home. She was so thrilled with the day of adreneline and all the things she was able to demonstrate, with what seemed like effortless goals. She got yet another excellent feed back to the clinical instructor, from the nursing and doc staff in the ER yesterday. I was so proud of her, and she is so animated when she is all excited and passionate about something. I really do think this is the area she would most thrive in, as a parent, I worry about the "burn out factor" involved in this line of medicine.... but I have to say, she is all over the critical thinking and acting ... totally awesome to watch in action. She is and has made me so proud!!! Hillary has been my blessing, my miracle, my ultimate accomplishment. I helped create a woman, a smart, beautiful, fun-loving, passionate, so very intelligent, and determined young woman ... where she decides to go is up to her, but I believe, as I have always told her, the sky is the limit if you want to apply yourself, you can do ANYTHING you want to do!!!! I can't say enough about her and all the things we share ... I hope she holds onto these things her entire life as I believe that they have helped her understand the world, prepare her for the cruelty out there. She is so aware .... but strives to do better, keep the bar high enough, and NEVER let it down.
OKay ... well .... again, lots of anxiety and nausea been hanging on my head this week. Last night, not really sure of times, I think I was already in bed, I felt and was awoken by major heat, so I shuffled to the kitchen, checked my blood, registered as 38 .... WTF .... I am so incoherant, Hilly was not home yet, I don't remember what I ate above the empty cereal box on the counter this morning, I do, vaguely remember sitting on the couch here and not being able to focus, hold my head up, I think I was scared ... it was not a good feeling ... I guess at some point, I shut my pump off ... in any event, when I awoke this morning I was at 504!! this sort of up and down stuff is the stuff that is killing me!! and I can't seem to control it even when I try ... it can be out of this world, frustrating. All my blood work earlier in the week came back "normal" ... .normal .... and yet my A1c was above 7!!! This pisses me to no end knowing I do everything in my power to keep on top of this. It is the most important factor ... without it, I don't function at all. I remain hopeful, and so totally believe that this cutting edge science, is the stepping stone to cures!! I must remain positive, focused, .... but damn, does ANYONE have any idea how hard it is to keep a pace like this throughout an entire life??? The distractions it can cause in lifes day-to-day activities for normal people??? How about we add on .... as life goes on .... arthritis, damaged bones, joints, after effects of being a punching bag, being diagnosed with digestive complications from diabetes, fibromyalgia, PTSD, heatt arrythmia, and some shit I would like to forget about completely, but have had to deal with, without a spouse or significant others .... I have had .... my daughter, for which I often times felt guilt over something I had no control over, had to let it go, and just tell her. She has always been supportive, even when she was not with me, and many times, I did try and get things taken care of without her presense or knowledge until after the fact. It is demanding at best, and a person, even with the best of spirits, gets tired. I am hoping for a little rest, soon, and yet know, I still have a lot of fight to go through .... and hoping that those of you that have taken on my cause, support me daily, have kept me in their prayers, and send constant good vibes and spirit ... I am so GRATEFUL!!! I have truly been blessed in the respect that I have been allowed to touch peoples lives in some small way ... that I touch and/or spark a passion for people to do good, go one step further, and yet ... REMAIN LAUGHING ... for me, laughing has been such an important part of my life, perhaps as a defense mechanism, but without a doubt, a grounding tool, for as long as I can laugh at myself and the things that happen to me, which eases others perception of the situation, no matter what happens, it needs to have a laugh, a smile, a hug, a human connection, and we all have that, we just need to allow to let it shine, and be receptive ... that is the hard part. :D
For all who continue to follow me, you are a blessing to me and my life!!! What you do is beyond words ... and I so appreciate all the support, laughs, kind words, encouragement ... ok ... well enough of pumping up your egos ... LMAO!!
I have things to get done, I will post again, most likely when I get to Texas as I will be alone, and need some sort of "connection" to the human race .... Be well, love those who are in your life, and tell them ..... we only have today, tomorrow is a the ultimate gift.
Peace and Light
ET
I am still sort of "catatonic" as Hilly would describe in the realm of this becoming a reality for me. I have been just trying to stay focused on work, taking care of things that need the day-to-day attention. Oh, and not to mention the childlike, selfish needs of my father, who has a knack for pushing my buttons. I try very hard not to let him get to me, but really, it is so beyond my comprehension at times as to how one man can be so stupid, so self-centered, don't care about you, take care of me attitude that I honestly don't know how my mother tolerated this sort of behavior for 60 years!!! Anyway, once I get his errands taken care of this afternoon, and listen to what will undoubtedly be 3 hours of ranting about nothing, and no concern what so ever for what is happening now, and wanting nothing more than for me to take him to a casino so he can blow $$ that a brother or 2 may have sent him (which is NOT going to happen this weekend!) I can come home and collect all the things that need to come with me on the trip.
I have been on another round of antibiotic this week, last dose tomorrow for an upper respiratory infection, which I believe just went from my head in November, to my chest now, as this has been the 3rd round of antibiotic since that time. Not exactly the state I wanted to be in going into treatment. I have been trying hard to pump clear fluids (my love of coffee hasn't been so much last couple of weeks:(); fruits, and my whole food supplements as I can't seem to eat as much of this stuff as appears to be recommended. I believe my "Juice Plus" has helped me get through so many of these surgeries, procedures, just keeping me going in a healthy manner, and the stuff has been studied world wide to prove this fact. It's good shit!!!! LOL ....
This past couple of weeks has been .... well ..... I can't come up with a descriptive right now. Work was okay ... I remained focused (not sure how), met my deadlines, tried very hard to get as much work ready for my girls ... hehehe ... so they have work while I am out. They will anyway as a system has been placed to get this done while I am out. They are all such wonderful women, have been so supportive of me, it is really a great feeling to have people in our lives that are so acceptive of each other, we all have trials that require a little extra support from our friends. One woman in our office had two sons leave for boot camp this week, and yet, yesterday, she was so totally apologetic to me, I so would not have expected anything less from her, I can't imagine the anxiety involved in sending our children off to the situations going on in our military today. Absolutely no apologies are needed on my end my friend. My prayers are with you and your boys during this trying time. Another working peer as you might address, came forward after what seemed like several months of chaos to make ammends of sorts, that was ...... not only a shock, but, openly I took it in, and it seemed sincere, I will, however, at this time, not dwell on this topic, remain cautious, and just allow the stars to flow ..... I am not a big fan of being used as a door mat when I really don't have the energy to go about my life with lies and deciept. My objective is to ... as the New Hampshire state motto says ... "Live and Let Live" .... I do not go about life to hurt, destroy, undermine, not into the drama, usually can't remember what I did last week, lol .... I take great pleasure in small conversations, sharing lifes trials and triumphs, the whole live, laugh, love mentality. It is what keeps me content and grounded. Whatever happens ... well .... it must have been meant to be.
Ok ... moving on .... Hillary and I have interacted well this week. I think she knows I am so preoccupied with what is about to happen. I know she would like nothing more than to accompany me, I know she is worried about me traveling alone and not being able to response fast enough to a drastic low. I am prepared to take the extra precautions as we hope for the decreased insulin intake. It is going to require my utmost attention to stay on top. Little does any one know, this factor has me scared to death!!!! Yes, I do have fears, my mother use to tell me she thought I dealt with my disease in such a "graceful manner" ... LMAO ... I very often did not share with her that certain happenings scared the shit out of me, and I often times have wondered myself, "how did I survive that one??" .... it is not a feeling I would wish upon anyone. The loss of time, memory so it seems as time goes on, .... it can be debilitating if one were to dwell on it. I think ... and I truly believe I learned this quality from my mother, you do what you can with what you have, plow forward knowing right from wrong, and hope for the best .... Oh, and ... let's add a little laughter ... because as we both did for so many years, find something in the darkest of situations ... to laugh about, even if it reflected back on us. It helps, it keeps us real, grounded, HUMAN. Everyone has trials, life is not all roses and wine ... it is "full of pricks" as my mother use to say ... LMAO ... it was how we cope and deal with these irritations that makes us stronger people.
Back to Hillary, she had a clinical day yesterday and was assigned to the emergency room. OMG!!! Talk about the kid finding her element ... she was pumped beyond excitement when I picked her up last night. (We have been carpooling this week as her truck is in the shop). She was a nonstop motor mouth for the 30 minute ride home and another 30-45 minutes when we got home. She was so thrilled with the day of adreneline and all the things she was able to demonstrate, with what seemed like effortless goals. She got yet another excellent feed back to the clinical instructor, from the nursing and doc staff in the ER yesterday. I was so proud of her, and she is so animated when she is all excited and passionate about something. I really do think this is the area she would most thrive in, as a parent, I worry about the "burn out factor" involved in this line of medicine.... but I have to say, she is all over the critical thinking and acting ... totally awesome to watch in action. She is and has made me so proud!!! Hillary has been my blessing, my miracle, my ultimate accomplishment. I helped create a woman, a smart, beautiful, fun-loving, passionate, so very intelligent, and determined young woman ... where she decides to go is up to her, but I believe, as I have always told her, the sky is the limit if you want to apply yourself, you can do ANYTHING you want to do!!!! I can't say enough about her and all the things we share ... I hope she holds onto these things her entire life as I believe that they have helped her understand the world, prepare her for the cruelty out there. She is so aware .... but strives to do better, keep the bar high enough, and NEVER let it down.
OKay ... well .... again, lots of anxiety and nausea been hanging on my head this week. Last night, not really sure of times, I think I was already in bed, I felt and was awoken by major heat, so I shuffled to the kitchen, checked my blood, registered as 38 .... WTF .... I am so incoherant, Hilly was not home yet, I don't remember what I ate above the empty cereal box on the counter this morning, I do, vaguely remember sitting on the couch here and not being able to focus, hold my head up, I think I was scared ... it was not a good feeling ... I guess at some point, I shut my pump off ... in any event, when I awoke this morning I was at 504!! this sort of up and down stuff is the stuff that is killing me!! and I can't seem to control it even when I try ... it can be out of this world, frustrating. All my blood work earlier in the week came back "normal" ... .normal .... and yet my A1c was above 7!!! This pisses me to no end knowing I do everything in my power to keep on top of this. It is the most important factor ... without it, I don't function at all. I remain hopeful, and so totally believe that this cutting edge science, is the stepping stone to cures!! I must remain positive, focused, .... but damn, does ANYONE have any idea how hard it is to keep a pace like this throughout an entire life??? The distractions it can cause in lifes day-to-day activities for normal people??? How about we add on .... as life goes on .... arthritis, damaged bones, joints, after effects of being a punching bag, being diagnosed with digestive complications from diabetes, fibromyalgia, PTSD, heatt arrythmia, and some shit I would like to forget about completely, but have had to deal with, without a spouse or significant others .... I have had .... my daughter, for which I often times felt guilt over something I had no control over, had to let it go, and just tell her. She has always been supportive, even when she was not with me, and many times, I did try and get things taken care of without her presense or knowledge until after the fact. It is demanding at best, and a person, even with the best of spirits, gets tired. I am hoping for a little rest, soon, and yet know, I still have a lot of fight to go through .... and hoping that those of you that have taken on my cause, support me daily, have kept me in their prayers, and send constant good vibes and spirit ... I am so GRATEFUL!!! I have truly been blessed in the respect that I have been allowed to touch peoples lives in some small way ... that I touch and/or spark a passion for people to do good, go one step further, and yet ... REMAIN LAUGHING ... for me, laughing has been such an important part of my life, perhaps as a defense mechanism, but without a doubt, a grounding tool, for as long as I can laugh at myself and the things that happen to me, which eases others perception of the situation, no matter what happens, it needs to have a laugh, a smile, a hug, a human connection, and we all have that, we just need to allow to let it shine, and be receptive ... that is the hard part. :D
For all who continue to follow me, you are a blessing to me and my life!!! What you do is beyond words ... and I so appreciate all the support, laughs, kind words, encouragement ... ok ... well enough of pumping up your egos ... LMAO!!
I have things to get done, I will post again, most likely when I get to Texas as I will be alone, and need some sort of "connection" to the human race .... Be well, love those who are in your life, and tell them ..... we only have today, tomorrow is a the ultimate gift.
Peace and Light
ET
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)