TGIF !!!

Another hectic week at work. The older I get, the harder it is to keep going for long periods of time. This week, I had two episodes of extreme lows, which as stated before, really take there toll on my body and mind, losing hours. On Wednesday night @ 2:30 in the AM my BS spiked up to almost 500!! That was incredibly painful, and the only conclusion we can come to is that it was a rebound high, from an extreme low. That threw an even more body bashing experience for me to overcome. Most of Thursday was pretty much miserable coming back from this. I went into work late, as it was almost 5 AM before I was able to fall back to sleep from the muscle and abdominal pain. When I got to work, everyone knew that I was not feeling well, my color was bad, I was sluggish, lets just say, "It ain't pretty." Co-workers were checking on me almost hourly, someone poking their head in the little window of my office door making a thumbs up or thumbs down sign for me to respond. My co-workers really are so incredibly supportive of me. I can't imagine why at times, I feel like I have a whole bus load of babysitters .... LOL. They all know how twisted I am, yet, don't hesitate for one minute to come to my rescue or do something so heartfelt. I really do appreciate each and every one of them !! I have been so totally blessed with all the friends I have made over the years. Today I got an email titled "PRICK" ... a coworker at the facility I was at yesterday, seeing me, wanted to make sure I was okay today, where I was at and who was around to check on me.... hehehe .... I had to respond with, "are you calling me one, or want to know if I have??" ..... as "prick" is how I refer to my finger sticks. ... :P

I was informed today that next week is going to be taxing on our department. As in I am going to have to do 12-hour days for at least 3 and perhaps all week. I hate deadlines, especially when they are due to someone else's lack of response. Oh well, this too, I am thankful for, as I always need the money, and to have a job where so many others have lost or don't have one. I also have a doctor appointment, and have to take my dad to see his doctor. So ... next weeks entries may be sporadic, if anything at all.

On another note, on Monday, I will be dropping my last envelope of information into the mail for the transplant team. Yippie!! My doctor appointment on Tuesday will FAX the information needed from there and I should be good to review completely. {{{{ fingers crossed}}}} I should have a call from them within two weeks. I was told by the nurse in charge that once all the paper work is in that it would not be long before I got the call to come and meet them, review, go over the protocol of the trial, the schedule for the following year, testing for type and match, etc. Exciting and scary all at the same time. I guess that is what life holds for us, at least it has for me. Sort of the "pick your poison" theory. Change is always scary, you know what's comfortable, do you stick with that even when it no longer works? I learned this when going through my divorce. I spent what seemed like months, on several occasions, sitting around staring at the walls, in my holey sweatpants, wondering, HOW. How would I take care of and provide for a small child, how ?? It came down to change, I could not help my husband at the time anymore than I had already tried over the years. People need to want to help themselves, and yet I continued to get "hurt" (in more ways than one). Was I scared?, you bet, petrified!! I knew it wasn't working, and I knew that it would never get better as it had only gotten worse over the years, in spite of the support I felt I tried to give him at my own expense. I do not regret my decision, for I feel had I stayed in the relationship, I would already be dead. That was something I was not yet ready to do, and here I am 17 years later and still fighting to stay in the fight.... LOL. I do believe that what we do in our lives is our own choice. This is my choice, and to have the support and encouragement of such a wide variety of people, friends, family, co-workers, medical staff, etc. is truly phenomenal. All because they like me ??? ..... LOL .... go figure!!! I have always tried to live my life based on the phrase "treat others as you would want to be treated." Don't get me wrong, I can and have put up a good fight along the way! I really am not sure what I have brought to people's lives that makes them so giving, caring, and supportive of me, but all I can say, is that I am the one that has truly been blessed!!

Okay .... well .... I hope everyone enjoys their weekend !! If you have nothing to do you can always come over and help me clean up the yard ... hehehehe ...... (can't knock me for trying ;)~

Later
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