HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!!!

for those that actually get into the whole thing.....lol .... not me so much.
Hilly went over to help my dad disperse the cavity eating treats and so that he doesn't have to try and get up and down repeatedly for he is not doing that well, yet INSISTS on the handing out of candy for the kids. For me, it works well because where I live, although a neighborhood, most of the town kids go to this big tailgating bash from 6-9 and they actually try and curb the older kids from going out. Not like it use to be .... but then again, what is??

Well ... time is flying by and I have no idea what to think about the upcoming benefit dinner other then .... certain people have taken my cause and run with it, and to me that is extremely overwhelming. At times, it is like I stop breathing the feelings are so overwhelming. I know ... this is really not the direction I should be thinking in. It is just an indescribable overwhelming feeling for a girl who for the most part, has not been a big fan of asking for help when needed but to plow through the issue at hand and move on. It would appear, that this issue, will not go away on my own wishful thinking. I need the help of those around me.

On Friday, I ventured to Phoenix for my usual 3 month check in with my endocrinologist. I knew things weren't looking good. I have the software from my pump to prove it and I, of course have her look at the print outs. Her office also downloads the info from my pump on appointment day so that too, gets the overall big picture. She was concerned to say the least. Told me we needed to "kick the dog up a notch," as Maggie isn't notifying me as to lows until I show signs, which often times is ALWAYS under 40. She reviews the logs .... 26, 32, 36, 34 28, and 36 were the half-dozen lows I have had in the past 3 weeks alone. Mind you ... these numbers on the norm would constitute emergency intervention. She told me, (like I was not already aware of this fact) that these are extremely dangerous lows and that the dog needed to be kicked up a notch in her newly acquired detection skills. Well ... I can't expect the dog to do something from nothing ... there are NO SIGNS until I get this low ... I am fine and then BOOM!!! Maggie has however woken me on a couple of these occasions that I can recall and what I find odd is that she follows/guides me to the kitchen and then sits and watches me as if she knows that the juice is next, lets get on it!! On the other end of the log was 589, 562, 549 and a few 400s after pushing my system with a steroid shot on a Thursday, a flu shot on Monday and then having a tissue issue with my pump site which was sending me into "nuts" mode as I was incredibly frustrated in my inability to get it back down into normal range until I changed out my pump site .... again. That can run into some money ... which I am low on as far as my living expense go. Fund money ... if FUND money and that is it!!! and we are not even remotely close at hitting my goal yet.

In any event, we reviewed my lab work.... all looked good for the most part and we both know how I got the A1c reading we did and it was the lows ... which is no way, in my opinion to achieve that reading. My kidneys function at a "remarkably normal level" which is a good thing given I just had my 38 year anniversary of living with Type I in early October. The kidney function is an important factor at this time in my live for me and the whole denial of partaking in the trial was apparently meant to be, being told yet again that antirejection drugs will kill off kidney function in a relatively short amount of time. In come the Stemmies .... we discussed the procedure, which Dr. C. P. is totally behind me on. Apparently, the fact that the treatment is not available here in the US and that she belongs to a large group of doctors, she asked me not to "advertise" her support publicly. She did, however, tell me that she expects approximately 2 weeks before we see any sort of changes, I bet a week. I then reminded her that even she has stated, "you never seem to do anyting text book." For many of the providers I have encountered over the years, a good percentage of them are amazed I still have some area of my body that appear to respond well to treatments, like my bones, and that I continue to prove science wrong in my understanding of my body, my disease. We also put a plan in place for when the treatment gets scheduled, and when I return to the states I am to meet with her in Phoenix prior to my return up the mountain to Prescott. Monitoring will become even more intense for a while and I may actually have to put a schedule of sorts into play. Something I don't really do other than wake up time, and bed time currently. Work will have to be a scheduled operation with no more letting lunches slide until a project is done, but when it is actually called for. It all sounded good .... but I still feel like crap. I am tired from the fairly constant up and downs with no real reason most times.

I am going to make a difference ..... and when it works for me, in spite of having ot perhaps undergo the treatment again, I am a firm believer that this is the closest we have currently and our best prospect to cure!!!! I have people watching me, waiting to see results, and if I show results, they are on board to have the treatment done as well. The questionable part currently for my doctor is the length of time I have had Type I.... but she too, believes it shows great promise and with better results thus far than treatments being offered here in the states.

Holding on to my faith, knowledge and continued prayers of those who are involved and "want" me around ..... I can't disappoint, I must give it my all and all fight.

Be well everyone as the holiday season comes upon us .... Thankful is something I truly am!!!

Peace and Light
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